002 - Octopus's Garden In the Shade

[thebeastwithout]

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[Today on the hot mess that is Retrospec, somebody's either fallen asleep on their keyboard or allowed their cat to play with the computer for too long, 'cause there's a solid string of this for about a minute straight.]

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Garfield Logan added 3 new photos - in Huntington Avenue, Recollé
2 mins

[The first photo is a blurry image of Gar screaming, with only his head and upper chest visible. Something long and twisty is visible at the edge of the frame.

The second is a slightly less blurry image of a... realistic-looking octopus tentacle, for some reason.

The last is an image of Gar's bare chest underneath a ripped shirt, which no one ever really wanted to see, but we're all being traumatized today so just go with it. Everything looks normal up until the part where his shoulder attaches to the octopus tentacle in the previous picture.

It's kinda gross.]

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Comments

[thebeastwithout]

uh
if my mom's more mad about me missing school than about me turning into a mutant octopus man i'm gonna have to get a new mom

and i've already gone through a few

look i don't mind chatting but i'm like seriously freaking out man
what do you guys do when this happens!!

[insantafe]

How should I know? All of

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<font face="courier">How should I know? All of <i≥my</i> memories are normal. Not a monster or superpower in sight.</font>

<small>[ he doesn't know anything about moms either oops ]</small>

<font face="courier">"Gone through a few?" What's that mean - you grew more?</font>

[thebeastwithout]

that's what i wanted!! but i got this instead!
...no ok that's a lie i totally wanted cool superpowers and awesome abilities...
look at where it got me!

let this be a lesson to you bro don't wish for anything cool or retrospec's gonna bite you in the butt

and uhhhhhh i mean i'm adopted man
i wasn't just at the orphanage outta the goodness of my heart
i mean, i wasn't ever at that orphanage, just, you know
solidarity?

[insantafe]

Normal memories aren't all fun and games, either, you know. I might not have had superpowers or anything but there's still plenty of bad things going on.

[ wait shit this isn't - that's not the conversation he wanted to have oh god ]

Oh, you meant... I thought you were still talking about the tentacles, not...
I mean, that's why I was there last month, too, but I figure most people come for charity or something.

[thebeastwithout]

oh cool
i mean, well, not cool
sorry bro

i go 'cause i got pretty lucky with how everything turned --
uh actually
maybe we can bond about dead parents sometime later if i haven't devolved into a mutant octopus it's kinda weird right now

unless you want to talk about your parents that's cool
i just might like, not be as good at talking when i don't have a tentacle fused to my chest

[insantafe]

Have you not been getting those memories like the rest of us? I would’ve figured you’d know by now if you were an octopus in another life.

[ jack’s actually just going to pretend the rest of this conversation didn’t happen if that’s alright with you ]

[thebeastwithout]

[good call]

i'm not an octopus!!!!!!

and all my memories have been boring or don't make any sense! there's like, a karaoke song, these five guys i don't know, and then like, my parents, but we're gonna not talk about that one

[insantafe]

Calm down, kid. Chances are if you don't remember being an octopus, then you're not turning into one for no reason. Could be it's just temporary, but you're not going to find out by yelling at all of us about it.

[thebeastwithout]

ok well first of all yelling on social media is my default reaction to everything so

second let's see how calm you are the next time your arm turns into some kinda monster tentacle