VIDEO [Backdated to 2/15]

[lastcomfort]

[ The broadcast starts with the shifting of the camera to show they’re in someone’s lovely abode. Hm. Maybe you’ll recognize some people in passing before the show starts? Once the the camera is balanced, everything comes to light.

Welcome to Mochi House Kitchen where our heroes, Akira Kurusu and Orihime Inoue, are suit up in the ugliest aprons you have ever seen. For reference, Akira is in this one and Orihime is the buff cook. ]

Hello! It’s so nice to have everyone together again. We’ve been up north for a while and we missed Valentine’s Day, but that doesn’t mean we don’t have something to show everyone our appreciation!

[ Akira doesn’t seem to get the memo that they’re recording. Thinking that she’s still practicing or whatever, he asks: ]

Hey, do you think we should use ghost peppers for a separate chocolate filling? Not in all of them, but maybe a handful.

Oh, yes! We don’t want those to go to waste.

[ Which she will actually start to place the ghost peppers with some onion and the chocolate on empty dumpling wrappers. As she folds them over carefully and sets them to the side, it should be noted that they look...almost entirely the same as the regular chocolate filled ones from the outside. ]

Stop by and try your luck today with a free stuffed penguin today! Maybe I’ll just let you do all the talking. [ Wait, this is supposed to commemorate the holiday. Whatever. ] Where did you get these aprons, anyway?

I picked them up at the thrift store! I thought we might want to dress the part if we’re cooking for everyone. They’re very unique, aren’t they? I’ve never seen anything like them before!

[ Probably for a good reason. But they're on the Valentine's Day theme, right? ]

They’re perfect.

[ Orihime smiles then turns purposefully to the camera. ]

They’ll be ready soon, so get them while they’re hot!

Wait, were you recording?

[ And then she waves and turns off the feed. ]

Comments

[maskreant]

i don't think that's how it works, James.

can't say i didn't warn you. i'll keep my thumb on the emergency button.

[frostythehitman]

i'm gonna kick that pepper chocolate's ass
where do i go to eat them

[maskreant]

at my place.

the door should be open.

[ He'll send it over privately? ]

[frostythehitman]

[ An hour later, he practically kicks Akira's door in. ]

Where are they.

[ He is a man on a MISSION. ]

[maskreant]

[ JAMES?? Akira is startled with his hands up in the air, apron on and everything. ]

... I said the door was open.

[ Here. He sets out the penguins for him. There's one of each waiting for him: Orihime's death filling, Akira's spicy filling, and normal chocolate. ]

[frostythehitman]

[ He watches Akira set out the penguins and then glares at them a good while. There's no outward distinction between any of the three, so really...he should just pick one at random and go for it. He's got equal chances of getting any of them.

He reaches out and pops the middle one into his mouth. After two chews, he grimaces horrendously--but keeps his mouth closed until he swallows. ]

I never knew how gross onion and chocolate together would taste.

[maskreant]

[ Akira watches James carefully with a cup of milk in his hand in case he needs it. Based on his rather leveled voice and normal complexion, he figures James is a devil? ]

When I pitched ghost peppers, I meant a small amount of puree into the chocolate mix itself... Not whole with onions.

[ Siiiighs. ]

Are you dead?

[frostythehitman]

[ well I apparently misread and thought there were separate onion chocolates and ghost pepper chocolates

but it's fine, whatever, let's just roll with it

James raises an eyebrow at him. ]

What, you think I can't handle a little chocolate?

[ He pops the second one in now as easily as the first. But about two chews in, he stops. Because the heat is suddenly hitting him full force now. His eyes widen and begin tearing up. His entire body tenses. Is this what death feels like? This might be what death feels like. ]

[maskreant]

[ We can always pretend they ran out, so some chocolates are only with onions. Even weirder. Akira thinks that James already had the ghost pepper, so doesn't stop him from having the other penguins. They should be plain.

But... ]

Hey.

[ YOU'RE SWEATING IN YOUR EYES... AND SWEATING? AKIRA IS CONCERNED. Here. Have the glass!! He puts the milk in his hand. ]

[frostythehitman]

[ He forcefully puts the milk down on the counter. ]

I don't need it. I'm fine.

[ Except he clearly, really does, because his words come out in a pained wheeze. He coughs violently for a second and lets his mouth hang open, trying to breathe in to let the cool air relieve the fiery hot pain a little.

But he's trying to be dignified about it. He clams his mouth shut again to try and ride this out as much as he can. Even as the tears begin rolling down his face. HE CAN HANDLE THIS, DAMN IT. ]

[maskreant]

[ No. He's not going to let someone die in his kitchen? Adamant, he takes James' hand and fastens the glass right back in.

You.

You drink this. ]

No one is watching. You can have your glass of milk unless you want to cry yourself dry. [ ... ] Think about your family.

[frostythehitman]

[ He clenches his jaw. Tears roll down his face. Somehow, even the tears feel spicy and his face begins to burn, turning an embarrassing shade of bright red.

And still.

He tilts the glass and pours all the milk out onto the tabletop. If he dies here, then at least he dies with honor. ]

[maskreant]

[ ??? Akira's eyes widen at this defiance—why are you doing this to their tabletop? Usually, most people would be dart for the towel to clean that up... We can pretend Elliot is doing that, so he's here.

Looking at James. ]

Any last words?

[frostythehitman]

If I die here, I die with honor.

[ Not that it sounds like it, the way he's wheezing through the spice.

He has to lean against the table now, arm braced against the surface of it. He's focusing so hard on trying to keep his face from exploding that his legs are weak. ]

[maskreant]

[ Out of consideration, Akira pulls up a stool for James to sit on when he's ready. It waits behind him, maybe bumping against his heinie. ]

So you wouldn't mind if I tell your family you died because of spiciness?

[frostythehitman]

[ He won't take the milk, but he will collapse into the seat as elegantly as he can manage (which isn't very). It still doesn't count as giving in. He's still fighting the spice. Sitting is okay. ]

Tell them I died defending liberty and freedom.

[maskreant]

[ He's quiet as James deposits himself into the seat with all the valor that wasn't worth it.

Not worth one bit. Leaning closer, he whispers: ]

You're asking me to lie?