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[coinflipped]

Isaac McKinstry March 5 near Pawn Promotion

So, question for everyone. If you’re a magical being of some sort that supposedly blesses people, but you’re also known as a Reaper, what do you think that exactly means?

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[sivard]

The Lord of Calamity...

[He echos it carefully, trying to call to mind a face, anything, but fails. He just has his current knowledge, which isn't much at all.]

Who knows what his motivations were. I can't see myself ever approving of it, but at the end of the day, I still made a promise with my true name. That wasn't something the past Zaveid would have taken lightly. Obviously, he cared about Eizen.

[But he also declared his devotion to the other mere minutes after Theodora's death. Would Theodora approve? Would she have even minded at all?]

Our past, the world our past selves came from... I'll be honest, I'm not wild about any of it.

[coinflipped]

Neither am I...

[His eyes feel heavy now just due to how much he's drunken and how much all this information has emotionally taken a toll on him. Exhausted is almost too light of a word to explain how he feels.]

If we could figure out our culture, then so much more of this would make sense. We're thinking of this as humans when we shouldn't be.

[Isaac would be fighting this if he were sober, but a mental block is gone thanks to the inebriation.]

In our culture, it almost seems like we have different reasons to have close ties to one another. It's not an emotional bond, yet it is. What triggers it?

[sivard]

Yeah. That's probably the problem.

Malakhim are a completely different race. We're human, and as a result, we have some pretty skewed perspectives.

[But Isaac does raise a good point. He folds his hands across his chest, wishing he was more sober.]

I'm sure there's more to it than romance, but it does seem like that's a big part of it. Maybe just general devotion...

[His head tips in thought.]

Maybe, because of a lack of direct blood relationships, ...other relationships aren't really frowned upon. Malakhim can live for thousands of years, so I guess it could just be different.

[coinflipped]

[Isaac now looks into an empty bottle, almost upset it's empty. Oh well, it's not like he doesn't have a ton more.]

Just like how I'm not related to my sister there like I am to my sisters here.

[Yet his obsession with this sister from his past life is an a whole different level. Then there's Zaveid where they... got married? Said they loved each other? After he killed her previous girlfriend? Um... he's not even sure how that works and he's pretty sure trying to think about it sober would hurt even more.]

I don't know how I could be devoted to someone for thousands of years. I can't even do it for a goddamn month as a human.

[sivard]

Maybe it's.... different.

[He wracks his brain, trying to think of what it could possibly mean. It's difficult, in large part because it honestly makes very little sense to him.

He sits up a little, frowning.]

Maybe it's deeper, somehow, than a marriage would be here. Not that it's not, you know, important, but we essentially bared our souls to each other, and that...

I dunno. It's something deeper and more permanent than a piece of paper, or a ring.

[coinflipped]

Deeper and more permanent...

[He parrots those words as he grabs another bottle of alcohol from the table and opens it. The logical side of his brain that would scream at him that this is a bad idea is so drunk off its rocker, well, it can't yell at him.]

...that sounds terrifying.

[He takes a few chugs of this new bottle before he adds an addendum.]

...I mean not that marrying you would be terrifying, but being in something more permanent than marriage.

[...yeah that's the closest he's ever going to get to some sort of confession and he probably won't remember he said that in the morning.]

[sivard]

Yeah, maybe.

[It does sound terrifying. He flashes a smile at the comment about marrying him not being terrifying, but doesn't comment. They're both drunk, and too focused on existential dread to take anything the other says too seriously right now.]

But, my past self giving Eizen his name moments after Theodora's death... maybe Malakhim default to open relationships. Giving your true name is precious, but not exclusive.

[coinflipped]

That'd make the most sense really.

[He looks up to the ceiling as if he can wrack his drunken brain to think a bit, but it's at the point where thinking too hard about anything is just not going to happen.]

Guess that's how I'm like now.

[Isaac, do us all a favor and don't verbally admit to being a fuck boy ever again...]

[sivard]

[It's probably because he's drunk, but the remark makes him snort and try to smother his laughter with his hand.]

Neither of us know enough to know where our past selves were coming from.

[Is sex even something Malakhim would be aware of, without hearing about it from humans?]

[coinflipped]

[He shoots Zaveid a lazy look for laughing at him.]

No, probably not. Until we learn more, we're just shooting in the dark.

[Maybe Malakhim didn't have sexual relationships... Maybe their bonds were some sort of weird emotional 'love at first sight' thing. Ugh... This is so against human logic that he's just going to stop thinking about it.]

[sivard]

Yeah. There's not much else we can do at this point, is there?

Retrospec sure isn't the sort to give us any useful hints!

[He sighs loudly.]

None of this makes any sense!

[coinflipped]

I quit trying to make sense of it about a minute ago.

[And he should have tried a long time ago, but no, he was curious about who he was and now he regrets it.]

[sivard]

Maybe it'll make sense one day.

Then again, maybe it won't. We're human here.