text ❁ alternatively, a youtube challenge in the making

[roseblooms]

Kit Fawkes shared a photo. 4/28 near Viea Village

I am being abducted, please find attached an image of my last known whereabouts. Actually, no, it's rather that apparently that my current living situation has become simply untenable to some people I know, and therefore I am now the recipient of an intervention seeking to Do Something About It, whether I like it or not. On the upside, I suppose a little extra room would mean more space to cultivate a proper garden, including some particularly interesting berry plants we found growing in Bosuma a few months back. Allegedly they render anyone who consumes them immune to toxins for several hours, but understandably I'm not entirely certain how to test that assertion. One can't exactly ask for volunteers to "eat this questionable berry and then allow yourself to be stung by these ten thousand bees", for example. ...Though now that I say it, I suppose that does rather sound like exactly sort of thing that someone would advertise for on Craigslist, doesn't it? ETA: Well, I've received at least one taker for the "eat the questionable berry and then drink poison" experiment, contingent on having a magical healer on immediate standby. Is there perhaps a magical doctor in the house?

[OOC: Berry plant link is solely for OOC reference!]

Comments

[crudest]

abduction is such a cold word
would a true abduction include lunch
which we'll do once you find someone that's up for your shitty experiment ig

[thesettingsun]

Much as I would like to volunteer to be stung by ten thousand bees, I'd introduce too many variables into the data, so I'll have to pass.

How bad is your home?

[quiet_storm]

You'll need a squishy human to try that, right?
If you've got a magic healer on hand and a bottle of poison then sure.
Why not?

[compendiem]

You brought the berries back. Fun.
I can both impart poison and cure it. I'd like to watch.

[servileness]

I do have to wonder if you didn't mean to put this entire post on Craigslist instead.

Should I send you eucalyptus in return? It seems you may need it.

[selfloving]

I'm worried enough about your test subjects, but please don't trust anywhere that man whisks you off to.

They may be about to commit scientific euthanasia, but you're in the gravest danger of them all. Is there someone we should contact for you?

[kagepuro]

I don't think you should joke about abduction, that really scared me for a minute : /

[spes_phthisica]

you know usually the interventions I get from my friends are more like them wading into my apartment and screaming about HOW CAN ANYONE LIVE LIKE THIS and I CAN'T EVEN SEE THE FLOOR
and then they aggressively clean everything
kidnapping is kind of a refreshing twist to it