03 | what will you do?

[elevelvetor]

good morning, Retrospec.
today, i'm hosting a choose-your-own-adventure... adventure!
if you would like to play, simply read the rest of my post and reply with your action; i shall supplement all details.
if you don't wish to, then simply keep scrolling.
thank you.
now, without further ado...

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Night has fallen on the sleepy seaside town of Willin' Wisp. The full moon casts her ethereal light on the cobblestone pavement and rough, shanty houses of the area you're in. Once famed for being a rich fishing town, Willin' Wisp has largely fallen into disrepair in the last fifteen years. Those that could fix it do not, enjoying their time eating rare, tropical fish imported from the capital of Helena instead. The town is staying afloat, but only just by the skin of its teeth, thanks to its oil business.

You are standing outside of the town's most famous tavern, though "most famous" makes it sound a little more glorious than simply "the only tavern in town." Inside the tavern, people shout and cheer and are generally incredibly loud, contrasting with the dead quiet that litters the streets.

There are exits to the south, east, and west of you. To the south is the tavern. To the east is one half of Mulberry Lane, which leads to the cemetery, the church, and the docks, where the oil businesses run their businesses. To the west is the rest of Mulberry Lane, which leads to the market, an area that is genuinely booming during the day.

What will you do?

Comments

[stopbleeding]

Go to In-N-Out.

[compendiem]

> Enter tavern

[elevelvetor]

You enter the tavern and find it just as loud as you expected it to be... and not only in volume. The front room is split into two types of decorations: there are yellow and orange leaves hanging to the left, along with bags of turkey feathers and bundles of bright red cranberries. To the right, however, everything is decorated in reds and greens and golds, with shiny tinsel and beautiful stained glass ornaments.

In the center of the room is a large, black line someone has painted in order to mark off equal portions; despite this, there are pieces of the right side stretching over to the left, and vice versa. Many people are arguing over it, as well as the holidays each of them are dressed for... and dressed for them they are. Those on the right are in red and white, and those on the left are in turkey costumes.

Thankfully, there are a couple of people without a talking (or, rather, an arguing) partner: the barkeep at the back, who looks incredibly tired by all of this; a pair of beautiful, fashionable young people of androgynous sex sitting at the bar; and a dog in the northwest corner with a sign hanging around its neck.

What will you do next?

[elevelvetor]

To your immense sadness, you recall that Willin' Wisp does not have an In-N-Out. It doesn't even have a McDonald's. The neighboring town of Fleeting Hope, however, does; you traveled through it earlier this morning. You also recall that Fleeting Hope is often called the fast food capital of Helena, the country you're currently in.

If you would like to continue In-N-Out quest, you remember you can leave Willin' Wisp through the north gate, which is opposite of the docks—that is, following the west end of Mulberry Lane would eventually get you to the town's main street, which definitely would have it.

If you'd like to do something else, there are plenty of other options.

What will you do next?

[lecturehall]

How fun~

I go to the west.

[compendiem]

> Approach dog
> Read sign around its neck

[stopbleeding]

No. I wouldn't have left In-N-Out town. I'm still there.

[elevelvetor]

You go west. The sounds of the tavern fade as you leave its immediate presence, and the gate of the market comes into view. Before you reach it, however, something crashes loudly in the alley directly to your left. A very human-sounding groan follows it.

Will you investigate, or will you continue on?

[coinflipped]

I suppose this is interesting enough.

Let's head east.

[elevelvetor]

That's right, you are. You wake up from your burger-induced sleep to find yourself in Fleeting Hope's biggest In-N-Out; the town of Willin' Wisp, and all of its interesting adventures, were merely part of some sort of strange dream. You can't remember much of it, but it doesn't matter.

Fleeting Hope is, after all, the best town in the world.

An elven waitress (for naturally such a big In-N-Out has waitresses; there is no other way to order your food in a restaurant the size of a small mall) comes by your table to ask if you're done eating, or if you would like something else. The menu is to your left, with exactly what you would expect from an In-N-Out... except the sizes gradually get bigger and bigger, even going beyond a cosmic size. You seemed to have stopped on the continental burger.

What will you do?

[elevelvetor]

The dog wags its tail as you approach; it's rather large and seems wolfish in appearance. The sign on its neck reads "Do Not Pet Me, I Am Being Shamed For Drinking The Master's Ale".

Will you pet the dog regardless, or will you listen to the sign? Or would you like to do something else entirely?

[compendiem]

> Ask dog to join party

[fiddlestick]

Oh this sounds fun!

> Enter Tavern

[elevelvetor]

You head east. The church quickly comes into view, in all of its illuminated and metal glory. Often called the ugliest structure in town, the church is a skeleton of wire and lights, yet its architectural importance cannot be overlooked: this is the world's only free-standing church, after all.

That is to say, it floats. Perhaps it's due to the electromagnetic waves given off by its innumerable lights, or perhaps it's due to the Mother's magical influence. No one can decide, and you recall this is a hotly debated topic. The closer you get to the church, the warmer the winter night becomes.

In front of the lighted church is a box with a sign beside it. To the left of the church is the cemetery, and to the right is the gentle slope of a hill. You recall that just past the hill is the docks.

What will you do?

[stopbleeding]

ride a cosmic one into space.

[lecturehall]

Investigate, of course! Someone could be hurt. Although I do approach cautiously. They could very well be a mugger.

[elevelvetor]

You enter the tavern and find it just as loud as you expected it to be... and not only in volume. The front room is split into two types of decorations: there are yellow and orange leaves hanging to the left, along with bags of turkey feathers and bundles of bright red cranberries. To the right, however, everything is decorated in reds and greens and golds, with shiny tinsel and beautiful stained glass ornaments.

In the center of the room is a large, black line someone has painted in order to mark off equal portions; despite this, there are pieces of the right side stretching over to the left, and vice versa. Many people are arguing over it, as well as the holidays each of them are dressed for... and dressed for them they are. Those on the right are in red and white, and those on the left are in turkey costumes.

Thankfully, there are a couple of people without a talking (or, rather, an arguing) partner: the barkeep at the back, who looks incredibly tired by all of this; a pair of fashionable young, beardless dwarves sitting at the bar; and a duck in the northwest corner with a sign hanging around its neck.

What will you do next?

[elevelvetor]

How brave, yet cautious! Your friend, Sir Mitzi, would have been proud of you. You approach the sound and, thanks to your enhanced vision, can clearly see it is a cat-person. He seems to be breathing and unhurt, but there is a heavy stink of alcohol around him.

His coloring is indistinguishable, due to nightvision only working in black and white, but he seems to be on the lighter side of the spectrum; he's dressed richly, with jewelry decorating his fingers and a crown shoved uncomfortably onto his head to keep it from falling off. The cat-person doesn't stir as you approach him.

What will you do?

[elevelvetor]

The dog tilts its head at you, not understanding the question. Unfortunately, your time with him is cut short, as a thick hand shoves you aside. This hand is attached to a tall, thick man -- he seems to be half-giant, given if he were anything close to an ogre, he'd only have a single eye. The man scowls at you and pounds his fist into his palm, leaning in.

He reeks, in general.

"What do you think you're doing with my puppy, eh? Lookin' to steal him, are ya? Well, you can't have 'im, he's mine. I stole 'im fair 'n squares."

[lecturehall]

[oh. attractive cat-men. he likes this narrative.]

Crouch down to help, of course. I'll check for his pulse and for fever. Is he alive?

[coinflipped]

We're going to go to the church because such wonderful architecture can't be ignored!

[Okay, so Isaac doesn't seen to care that's not an option and he's ignoring the box part.]

[compendiem]

> Ask man to borrow the dog, with a promise to return him later, in exchange for half the treasure earned after the adventure

[elevelvetor]

You order the cosmic burger. The waitress sighs and tells you it'll be out in fifteen minutes, before moving onto the table beside you to take their order. Immediately she is assaulted by three young men offering to fill her up with more meat than any burger could.

She looks tired, but resigned, as she asks them again what they would like to order.

At another nearby table, a pair of businessmen loudly discuss their own business ventures in Fleeting Hope. You don't recognize either of them, however, suggesting they may be aspiring entrepreneurs.

Poor saps. They'll never make it here, not with the Illuminati having such a firm hold on the food industry.

On your table, you still have a large order of fries that has been left unfinished but has also acted as your pillow for the past several minutes of food coma, several empty burger wrappers, and an extra large soda that's nearly done.

What's next, burgerfiend?

[fiddlestick]

Gee, I wonder what this is about.

> Read the sign on the duck.

[stopbleeding]

throw my fries at the meat assholes. duh.