001. Do you need love? Am I enough for you?

[diamant]

so i have a question
how long does it take on average before the memories we're all receiving start actually being interesting
because for now they're just weird and sad

there's been nothing in them to show what sort of person i was like
or what i did with myself if anything
or if my life was good or bad enough to matter
i've only got a few so far granted so maybe i'm just impatient

but for the time being they're just kind of making me sad
not because anything bad's happening in them
more because they're making me miss things that i've never had

it's a weird feeling, i don't like it

but basically on average how long is it going to take before things stop being boring
and start getting interesting
is there a way to speed up the process

Comments

[informantic]

I wish I could siphon off some of the excitement from mine and give it to you, honestly, because I've gotten far too much for my liking.

[diamant]

is it anywhere near the good sort of excitement
or is it just a bit much no matter how you look at it

[informantic]

Where do very elaborate attempts on your life rank for you?

Once by being bound to a chair in a building full of explosives, and then again by having someone t-bone your car at full speed?

[foeyay]

if you wanna remember interesting things, you have to do interesting things!

[diamant]

is that how this works
unfortunately i don't have things to aim for
i don't know anything about this person my soul's remembering
or whatever this is
and there's a big difference between superhero interesting and spy movie interesting
and a bigger difference between spy interesting and fantasy space opera interesting
so i'm unsure what i should be doing differently

[foeyay]

tell me what you're doing now. i'll help you out.

[godcards]

Sounds like you're just a boring person.

[diamant]

maybe
i've been told it might take a while before the interesting things happen
if that's the case then that's fine
it's just really awkward for the time being

[godcards]

Whoever told you that might have been trying to be nice.
My first memory certainly didn't start off how you're describing.

If you get multiple memories that are boring, you're most likely boring. That's how it goes...

[deathboss]

I get the weird feeling of wanting things that you don't have like, I don't even know all the names of the people I saw traveling with me, but I feel like we were close and it's the time of connection I don't quite have here, if that makes sense.

As for jolting part maybe if you start watching or reading things it might give you memories again.

[diamant]

no that's exactly it
i'm not remembering a whole lot outside of someone that i think i was in love with
and i've never had anyone like that
it's a little lonely i guess

taking in media is an interesting way of going about it though
will something not directly related like that work

[deathboss]

Oh man I'm so sorry bro. I kinda dread but also hope I get a memory like that one day...at the same time if it's all I would get I'd feel the same too.

Maybe just talking about things helps I found. I had clown memories when I talked about clown with someone else.

[adoringpast]

i guess it depends from person to person
like some people would get the most traumatic ones as their first memory and some would get the most mundane ones

just give it a month or two if you're that impatient

[diamant]

that's what i've heard, that it may take a few months
that's both promising and really boring
but i suppose if things continue to be like they were this month
then i'll have something to do with myself in the meantime

i guess i should consider myself lucky that i didn't jump right into the trauma
assuming any exists

[adoringpast]

do you really want to be traumatized by the atrocities your former self may or may not have committed that badly

sometimes having a boring past life can be a good thing, yknow

[floret]

I think it's just random chance, if my experience is anything to go by. I feel like I keep swinging back and forth between remembering something really pointless and mundane, and remembering something bizarre/upsetting. And even after almost six months, and all kinds of weird memories, I still don't really have a handle on what kind of person I used to be...

[diamant]

hopefully you'll figure it out eventually
i think that would be the worst personally
not knowing what sort of person i was in the end i mean

[yakan]

the first one i got was with a woman threatening to eat me if i didnt get her a human eating snake so id say mine was sort of interesting from the start
its really pretty random id say so theres probably no estimate

[diamant]

how well did that work out for you
in your memory
do you know

[yakan]

well
im not entirely sure but i later got a memory of her turning into giant fox and actually trying to eat me
it sort of cut off before she actually bit my head off completely

[selfloving]

I believe I've experienced something similar to that sadness. People I know longer know, friendships I can no longer quantify... It feels as if something was absent that was never there before, and it's more or less impossible for it to exist now. [Or would have seemed impossible...the lengths to which reality can be pushed are really remarkable, even after several months.]

As sad as they are, those are the memories I'd prefer, though. It's nice to know there might have been some good things, once, in that world I lived in. I'd trade some of the more demonstrative ones to you for that.

[diamant]

i guess that's a good way of looking at it
if we have to get things like that at all
do you not have very many good memories then

[selfloving]

Wherever I lived, it was a very dangerous place and time. I've seen things happen I really wish I hadn't. So, yes, I suppose you could say they aren't particularly good.

If it suits you, you might look for others who are in similar straits. It's a strange feeling, bonding over something you don't have, but there are a few supportive people in possession of this application.

[spes_phthisica]

tbh I have a hard time deciding which is worse
the way too exciting ones or the ones that make me feel kind of wistful
I mean probably the too exciting ones, but I'd prefer it if they were ALL kind of just weird and random and that's it

why "miss things you never had"?
I mean I guess that's a really direct question but... if you don't mind saying, I guess

[diamant]

oh it's not like it's a secret or anything
or at least i don't think it should be
i've been remembering being in love with someone