retrospec | {1st Clear Card, video}

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{1st Clear Card, video}

[Sakura's back again on the app. Which, once she gets back home and realizes she still can't find certain items, well. Of course she is Concerned. Though not necessarily for reasons others might assume. Not so much for what this means for herself, especially given how defenseless this leaves her without her magic and cards, but she is. Worrying about the cards. Because of course she is.

She idly brushes a longer strand of hair framing her face behind her ear, biting her lip as she uses her phone, opening the Retrospec app. Which shows her bedroom in Fai and Iwai's place, where she sits cross-legged on her bed.]

Um, if everyone missed it before? I'm back. I mean, I have the app again. I'm sorry if I worried everyone before. But I just wanted to check. To ask, I mean. Others have probably gotten the app after having it deleted from their phones too, right? Only, when I got back, I realized some things were missing still. My cards. And my neckla-- my staff I use with them. They're gone. So is my bear.

[Anyone might question the bear, but this particular bear is unique and special, given her bond with Xiaolang. With his Other in her memories, Syaoran. Let alone if someone thinks she might be talking about normal playing cards or something.]

I usually always have the cards and necklace on me, and the bear usually stays in my room, but. When I got home, I can't find them anywhere. And I'm sure I didn't leave anything in...in that glass case I woke up in. If anyone has seen the cards, please tell me! Or at least, make sure they're alright.

[To be fair, it isn't like the cards are exactly defenseless, or necessarily vulnerable, considering the chaos they caused in her memories, but even so. She can't help worrying. And not just because she isn't sure how she is supposed to figure tricking her family with stopping them from worrying if she doesn't have Mirror to stay home in her stead while dealing with App Things?

She holds up a couple of drawings to try show what the necklace and an example of one of the Clow Cards look like.]

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I've....had the app for about a year now? Or, besides last month.

[That one month being an exception. It seems. Still, she knows this is....a lot to deal with, especially for the first time. Touya is just figuring this out. Sakura wants to try help. At the same time.....well. There is a lot she knows he would decidedly not be thrilled to hear about with her dealing with this for so long already.]

[ Annnd there goes Touya actually grinding his teeth for a moment. He definitely hasn't gotten that far back, and that's such a long time and from what he can see, it's...

Well. Not great experience. ]

May I come to your room?

[ Beeecause he has questions and he's not sure there's anything as truly private over the network. ]

Hm? Ah. Yes.

[In person is probably better. She's sure he has a lot of questions, after all. So it makes sense for this to be better done more privately rather than over the app. So she agrees, biting her lip as she sits on her bed with her phone. Trying to figure how she felt about this development of him having the app too.

Perhaps some part of her might be relieved not to need to hide things anymore. Having someone else in the house to talk to about it all. While also being worried because it meant he was involved in all of this too.]

Thank you.

[ Touya may be a terrible tease and regular grump, but his manners are where they should be. Most of the time.

He also makes a detour to bring a pitcher of water and two glasses on a trey - not enough of a delay to make Sakura worry, but an additional minute for her to gather her thoughts. Not much, but but something.

Knock knock knock. ]

[She glances up from replying on her phone to responses when she hears the knocking at her door. Of course, she is expecting him, so she tells him the door is unlocked, shifting slightly in putting her phone down at her bedside table and holding to one of her stuffed toys on her bed.]

Onii-chan...

[Where to even start. She's not sure how much he might already know.]

Sakura.

[ Softer, definitely softer than usual.

Then he sets the water where they both can reach it, and places his hand on top of Sakura's head for a moment. For once, not ruffling her hair while at it, just looking at her face.

Eventually, he moves, only to sit down on the floor in front of her bed, one leg folded up in front of him so he can lean his arm on it. ]

A year is a long time, though I managed to see that Fai, Iwai, and Noah all had it, too. Did you and they stop having it at the same time?

[ Since he hasn't exactly had a chance to verify either way. He's also gotten to the shared documents about the app, though he's only glanced over them before Sakura's message came through. ]

Noah-san was more recent. But it's been a bit since Fai-san and Iwai-san had the app now.

[It's probably better this way. Especially given Fai's transformation, or the start of it, with his being a vampire. One eye closes as she feels his hand on her head, as she anticipates him messing up her hair. But he doesn't, not this time. She shifts then, once he sits on the floor, to take the offered water for a sip.]

[ Touya clenches his jaws so hard that his teeth grind together for a moment. Sakura was alone and he didn't even know. She wasn't alone for a while, but then she was, even while being right here with them most of the time.

He breathes in through his teeth. ]

I see.

Sakura...

Are the things you remember ... good ones, or not?

[ He has a lot of things to come to terms with about the situation here and now, and he won't be able to help until he does. But, as far as he can tell, memories are individual, even if sometimes people share some of them. So perhaps starting there, when it comes to his sister, will be most useful.

~~He should have taken a couple of psychology classes ... maybe next semester.~~ ]

Hm. Some of it was good? Like meeting Fai-san and some of the others. But not all of it with the app is necessarily good to remember.

[Sometimes it hurt. Sometimes it was dangerous or just cruel. She still haven't figured that it was Illusion she saw rather than it actually being Nadeshiko, last October with the fog making them see things.]

Or, um. If you mean my memories of...of the other me. That's. A bit of both too, I guess.

[ Touya. Looks down for a moment. What a great job he's done, not knowing anything about it all until now. But then he looks up to her and nods. ]

Well. Now I won't forget if something is wrong and you tell me.

[ Because, with the way they are, that couldn't have been easy on her, either. ]

You're....not going to get mad, right?

[About everything she couldn't tell him before. Everything she is thus currently 'hiding' from him. And deciding just how much to tell him, straight up or at all, for that matter. Sakura bites her lip before having another sip of her drink, raising her other hand to brush some hair back.]

[ ... that's not fair, Sakura, to ask him like this. A frown flickers on his face, then he looks away. ]

I can't promise that I won't get angry overall. But I probably won't get angry at you.

[ He wants to promise her. But he wants to avoid lying to he more. You don't build trust with a sibling upon a foundation of lies. And this is the best he can honestly commit to, considering how much is unknown. ]

It's just....a lot happened. Since I got the app myself. Things you weren't aware of because you didn't have it, and....sometimes it might have been a little dangerous.

[She trails off nervously, hand not holding her drink fidgeting with her clothes as she glances hesitantly at him. Because she's sure he wouldn't be thrilled to learn about the fog last year in October, when she'd followed what had looked like their mother and probably would have drowned if not for others saving her. Or her running off after Fai when he had initially turned into a vampire and attacked Iwai. Let alone the other dangers from having the app for so long by now.]

I think... that at least you having the app meant that you could do your best, Sakura.

It would be worse to be helpless, wouldn't it?

[ Ohhh he is so very mad. But this is his sister and while he teases her mercilessly while she is safe, her nervousness is not to a small measure based on fear, and that means he needs to smooth that out first. Needs to. ]

I'm trying. To help how I can at least. And remembering more...though that sometimes just gets more confusing, more questions.

[She still has so many questions. Still wonders about some of the things she's seen in her memories. Some of what she has heard. But it's not all chronological, making it hard to keep track. Even if she might try, with a diary of sorts.]

But you're right. I think, even with everything, it's....better to have the app.

[ Touya nods, his brows furrowed. Then... looks away, just for a moment. ]

Sakura...

I read that some people are family here who come from different worlds. Do you remember... any of our family from this life? In the memories from before?

Our family in those other memories? I don't remember Fai-san or Iwai-san from before....

[She had expected to remember Fai at least. Since he seemed to remember her and Syaoran. Or at least some other version of them. But that hadn't happened, at least not yet.]

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{1st Clear Card, video}

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