retrospec | (no subject)

I know we've all been a bit distracted lately, not only from the abrupt loss of two colors from the spectrum, but all the usual school madness that occurs in June. Grades are coming in, summer sessions are about to begin, and that's an understandably stressful time.

[To say nothing of sleep loss. Rosalind certainly looks exhausted as she glowers into the camera. Behind her, chalkboards are filled with equations, and someone with a particularly clever mind might be able to spot a trend towards space and time.]

However. Let me give a few of you a piece of advice. I know several of you are in university right now, or about to graduate high school and enter into it. If you ever send a professor who failed you something like what I'm about to attach, you will not change their minds. Point in fact, they'll be even more determined to fail you. I know I certainly am, and I'm not even the one dealing with this right now.

Rosalind Lutece shared a photo.
6/16 near Recolle University

Honestly, I preferred the bribes to this.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Hold on, let me—

[And he clears his throat, thumps on his chest with a closed fist, and reaches off-screen to procure a snapback from seemingly nowhere to put it on his head but backwards. Then he speaks in a tone that could only be described as Fraternity Star Starting Linebacker.]

"Professor Bruh.

While I realize that I probably ditched 90% of your classes because of splitting hangovers or my attendance at daytime ragers in order to maintain my reigning champ status at Frat Physics 101, also known as beer pong, I really think that I should be graded more nicely on this final and or paper that reeeaaally screwed me over. I'll give you my vape pen if you reconsider.

Signed,
Dudebro."

[and then he removes the hat and proceeds to fling it offscreen into the void, snorting as he does]

Something like that, maybe?

[OH NO, oh, no, she has to push her hand over her mouth in order to stop herself from laughing. For a few seconds Rosalind's shoulders shake and she glances away, waiting until she can speak steadily before uncovering her mouth.]

That was an uncanny impression.

[Baren full on grins at the reaction - ]

What, too hoity toity to let yourself have a laugh, Professor? Didn't know academia meant you couldn't appreciate some humor I worked real hard for.

[But he doesn't let it hang too much, instead waving his hand and moving on.]

Anyway, I'm of the impression that if you've met one of those types, you've probably met 'em all.

To be perfectly fair, every once in a great while, one manages to surprise me.

[NOT OFTEN. But it's happened. Once. Actually, that person played tennis, so does it even count?]

And what about you, then? Are you a student, or simply an observer of these kinds of people?

[Baren just manages a laugh of disbelief - sounds fake but ok.]

Yeah, I guess I'm a student. Maybe I can't say much since I'm just as guilty of skipping as Mr. Dudebro over here, but I have a feeling our priorities are considerably different.

[maybe?? baren ditches because he finds the work boring and would prefer to be making money, but who can say what dudebro's backstory is]

His type is just unfortunately hard to miss even when I do make it to campus.

And what is it you study, when you find the time to attend?

[Now she's a bit intrigued, okay. And if he skips, that's on him, but at least it's not her problem, so she can successfully ignore it.]

Aerospace engineering.

[that's

a lie

but his delivery is still smooth as silk]

Really.

[Like, granted, maybe he is. But she can't imagine someone going into so specific a field and yet being apathetic enough not to attend classes.]

[aaaand he keeps it up because what else is he supposed to do]

Aren't instructors supposed to not judge a book by its cover?

They're also not supposed to engage on social media with students, and yet here we are.

I feel like I'm learning so much about behind the scenes academia from you, Professor...!

Your education is only just beginning, I promise you; you haven't even heard all the petty inter-department politics that go on.

Let me guess: Physics and Philosophy just don't get along. What'd they do? Start boycotting the office cooler? It's a race to book the meeting rooms for weekly staff meetings? Geology bumped Geography's grievances out of the meeting minutes?

Only the juiciest gossip, I'm sure.

[Rosalind is 100% prepared to cut the football team for taking most of the budget, lbr, but she's not about to say that.]

You joke, but keep a close eye on your teachers the day a tenure position opens up. One's bound to end up disappearing mysteriously.

Tenure basically means that you can do whatever you want with low risk of getting fired, right?

Power without consequences would sound tempting to anyone.

Hence why we all get incredibly competitive when a spot opens up. It's a guarantee that your future is secure, not to mention you get a free pass to teach more of what you like.

And I bet the department would back you up if you killed a man.

[he's joking but also he wonders if it's true]

I'm their smartest employee by far. They'd almost certainly back me up, although I haven't yet felt inclined to test that theory out.

Really? You have a lot of patience. I can name at least 5 people. Easy.

Sorry, five people who what?

Five people who annoy me enough to contemplate murder on a normal day, can't imagine what it'd be like to try to teach them. Those kinds of people.

[Again, her hand comes up to cover her mouth, hiding the amused smile that wants to appear.]

You learn to live with it. And realize that you can get away with snapping at them, to start with. And that while attractive in the short-term, murder will ultimately backfire.

It's why I just stick to contemplation.... but you know, dudebro sometimes sounds like he really deserves it.

Did you actually respond to him? Or is he left in the void wondering what will become of his GPA?

I haven't yet, but that doesn't mean I won't. I'm waiting to discuss the matter with my assistant.

Your assistant? Or your getaway car for when you gotta hide the body?

(no subject)

originallutece - 2017-07-03 02:27 (UTC) - Expand

crudest - 2017-07-06 06:05 (UTC) - Expand

Rosalind Lutece shared a photo. 6/16 near Recolle University