text ❖ it's the mike and mo halftime show

[doitrockapella]

Carmen Sandiego shared a photo. 11/19 near *̸̗͈͔̺̙̥͐̏͐͊̅̀̇͊͌͞/̴̛̼̦͍̟̑̀̆͋͜*̵̠̣͍̓̏̋̌̑̌̐͜͜͝ͅ|̸̻̪̰͔̇͗̊̃͋͊͢͝͠*̸̢̧͓̦̫̞͖͌̈́́̎̇͞͡͝|̘̤̩͙͇̯̱͊̔͐̚̚*̡̧̜̹̗̆̿̂̄̃̀͠͠͠ͅ\̴̨͉̱̼̜̭̀͑̇̇͆̔͜͠*̢͓̯͕̩̙̬̏̽͂̃̅̃̂͡

Greetings and good evening, Ninja Warriors. With less than a week left before the big event, I think this is a fine time to hear some stories of your training exploits over the past few weeks. How have you been finding the course? Are you bonding well with your team — or, if you're going it solo, are you feeling confident about your chances of victory? Which obstacles are you finding a breeze, and which ones are proving to be your greatest nemesis? I want to hear all about it. As for me, I've committed to taking on the course while wearing a pair of these, and the Sandiego Foundation will be making a contribution to a charity of the solo winner's choice in the amount of one thousand dollars for every obstacle I clear. (Which I intend to be "all of them".) If you're interested in joining me in the attempt, let me know; we're happy to sponsor any and all takers in the fun. The big day is coming up fast, so remember to save the date, keep training hard, and I'll be looking forward to seeing all of you out there next weekend!

Comments

[parodeity]

as long as im not tired i wont slip
but like
do you have alternative suggestions
i am weak to cold

[doitrockapella]

We could put an airtight dome over the whole complex and heat the place to eighty degrees...

[parodeity]

for real or teasing

[ HE REALLY. HATES BEING COLD ]

[doitrockapella]

...Well.

We do have the better part of a week...

[parodeity]

my natural habitat is not snow
and also
way more sun
and yet i am surrounded by winter dwellers

[doitrockapella]

Tell me about it. I've been a lot of places in the world, but home still always means the mediterranean climate of San Francisco.

[parodeity]

oh my god you get me
for me its like
texas
texan heat
all this snow crap is pretty i guess aesthetically but get it the hell away from me maybe

[doitrockapella]

It's usually a dry heat in Texas, isn't it? You don't get a lot of muggy days?

[parodeity]

typically yeah
i dont mind muggy so much though
any variety of warm is ok with me

[doitrockapella]

Well, I don't know the feasibility of heating the whole dome YET, but rest assured I'll be looking into it.

Somehow I doubt you're the only competitor who wouldn't mind a warm atmosphere for their run.

[parodeity]

daisuke was worried a punishment for breaking rules might be forcing us to run barefoot in the cold

[doitrockapella]

I promise to overrule any penalty you might get to that effect.

You'd have to take off your heels, after all.

[parodeity]

nepotism
i can dig it

[doitrockapella]

Everything in moderation, as the sages say. Presumably that includes nepotism.

[parodeity]

usually ppl dont do nepostism in moderation
i assume bc thats part of the whole power corrupts schtick
wherein people who are corrupted with power
are not good with moderation?
like hey i have three mcmansions already
but what about a fourth and fifth
i hear the fifth mcmansion comes with a kids meal toy
gotta get that
it might be like a fucking decoder ring or something

[doitrockapella]

That is unfortunately the case. Speaking as someone who hangs out in the company of a lot of people who got to where they are through nepotism.

They start to forget that people who aren't them are still people, too.

[parodeity]

how do you think they manage that
like
to go through life and see people right in front of you and not realize
theyre people
who maybe deserve at least idk
a pat on the head