[ hero complex intensifies ]

[hjack69]

aight weve talked about the memollucinations ( im calling them flashbacks bc i never want to type memollucination ever again ) before so w/e about those

now i wanna hear from you folks that had new weird shit happen
im talking physical marks showing up out of nowhere
getting stuff from retrospec
the ability to make gravity your bitch ( or some other weird power thing i guess )

nothings happened to me personally outside of remembering stuff but people are starting to get hurt and im gonna make damn sure it doesnt end up a regular thing
you can share what you remember if you want it might trigger someone elses flashbacks

here i even made a survey

Name: Age: Occupation: Describe the weird crap you've had to deal with:

ya welc

[ This can kind of function like an open post if you like! Threadjacking is cool, etc. ]

Comments

[hjack69]

nah nah this horse DEFINITELY didnt have a saddle on
wouldnt a saddle slide all over the place against a smooth surface anyway?
also the two horns looked kinda stabbity if you tried slapping anything like that on it
but it had bows in its
hair?
idk if the hair was made of diamonds too but it had beautiful braids and little pink bows on

im starting to think this horse was a chick

[doublesmall]

okay, okay, hold the fuck up.

horns??

god, I probably shouldn't question this considering the thing is apparently made of diamond anyway but are you SURE this was a pony

[hjack69]

see my mind is saying " pony " but the more i think about it the more im leaning towards unicorn
wait
unicorn w two horns
what are those called

but i KNOW it was a pony ok
it was pony sized

[doublesmall]

I mean I guess it would be a bicorn in that case?

a pony bicorn.

maybe it was just a baby one or something and that's why it was that size, or

no, why the fuck am I even talking about a diamond animal like it would grow normally

1/2

[hjack69]

no this looked like a fully grown horse just
adorably miniature
you know how would a diamond animal even reproduce?
hot diamond on diamond action?
nah youd prob have to make it with
uh
science or something

man still cant think of a good name for it if it ever shows up tho
jade wolf got dancing fruit why cant i have a diamond horse??
that shit aint cool
directing this towards any and all spectating retrospec assclowns

[hjack69]

I WANT MY FUCKING HORSE RETROSPEC

[doublesmall]

just to clarify: if someone with a thing for clowns calls someone an assclown are they insulting, flirting, or both? this is important.

and you know what, I'll cosign this, get the man a fucking diamond horse

if we're going to be fucked with by horses getting replaced with those demon birds then we the people deserve at LEAST one (1) diamond pony bicorn existing in the city.

it's only fair

[hjack69]

now THIS guy
my kinda guy right here
petition has two signatures folks better hop to it

and its intent really
like " ooh babe you got a great ass and youre a clown so youre an assclown "
vs " ill put you in a fucking ditch if i dont get my money you backwards assclown "
also depends on whether youre schmoozing or dangling somebody at the top of a flight of stairs

[doublesmall]

they're the only two signatures that are even really necessary, right, that should definitely do it.

and I don't know, I think mixing those up could be a very effective combination.

I mean I bet it'd fucking terrify someone if you dangled them from the top of a flight of stairs and then also hit on them. like, they would never fuck with you after that.

[hjack69]

half mast before i even hit the end of that first sentence
love a good flatterer
if i get a diamond pony you can ride it

idk could you hit on somebody if they were like
totally gross?
im talking greasy im talking snaggletoothed im talking bo out the wazoo
what if they called your bluff
what if you had to play gay chicken to keep up the act or totally lose all intimidation factor

see now you gotta tell me what youd do im curious

[doublesmall]

you're welcome. :* I'll hold you to that

and shit, I don't know, I've probably done that drunk but doing it on purpose is a completely different story. maybe the solution is to just only make hot enemies, you know? must be at LEAST an 8 to be worthy of my enmity, 9s are rival status, 10 puts you on the archenemy level. problem solved.

[hjack69]

yknow you might actually be onto something here
filter out all your enemies by hotness and boneability
like if youre a five or below im not even gonna spit on you
six thru eight if its enmity you want ill shake your bouncing booty
nines and tens get the option to fight naked possibly in jello or mud

[doublesmall]

exactly

then you'll never have that kind of problem because nobody you're fighting is unattractive

...well, I guess exceptions might have to be made sometimes, but those are just the breaks, right? hire that shit out to other people, maybe.