retrospec | 005. Text // my world is unaffected

It's been some time since Retrospec has properly dropped some sort of identity crisis on us, though I suppose it's good to know that we're getting a bit more information out of them now than we were in the past; I'm in no way looking down on small favors and silver linings. Just the same, I wonder for the time being where that leaves us - I know I've asked a few of you about this in the past, and I'm sure that a fair amount of you have made your decisions regarding it since.

I suppose what I want to hear is your thoughts on these people you're receiving memories of, whether you consider them "you" or otherwise - do you still think of them as a separate person from yourself or do you consider them to be the same as "you", and why you've come to feel that way. I'm not going to argue for feeling one way or another on the matter, I'm just wondering how you've come to see these people that technically don't exist anymore.

Of course, if you reject this entire matter completely and just consider this to be an example of some corporate entity you hate ruining your life for no apparent reason, that's likewise fair.

I've formed my own views on this fairly recently; I tend to find it calming, having some sort of conclusion that I can accept as reasonably true for the time being. It's not always convenient, but it's calming.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

It makes sense, yes, as does the desire to compartmentalize it both for simplicity's sake and for the sake of keeping one's sanity more or less intact. You aren't the first I've spoken to that feels that way, and I don't fault you for it, even if it's not something I can subscribe to myself.

thank you.
i've been worried (perhaps reasonably, perhaps unreasonably) that fully accepting it and acknowledging it would change things between myself and others
or perhaps, more distressingly, make me feel certain emotions that would be
let's call them "difficult to deal with".
purely as an example: memories of being incredibly fond of someone, and such things coloring your interactions with them, regardless of your current relationship with them or theirs with others
another example: a relationship, no matter the type, being pushed upon you because "we were [like this] in our memories, why can't we be that here?"

[ ............. ]

to be frank
speaking about this in such terms makes me feel quite melodramatic and overreactionary
my apologizes for the long message

[...liz did you remember that one of the people here was your boyfriend once because that is what this sounds like- ]

No, that's an entirely fair concern. To be frank, I'm not certain what I would do about it if some of the people I've remembered were to be signed onto the network suddenly; it would be awkward, to put it gently.

[ she's not allowed to make any comments one way or the other without her lawyer present. ]

then i hope that none of them ever do
as counterproductive as that seems like it would be towards Retrospec's goal (?) of resuscitating the worlds in our memories...
what do you think of their restoration project?

Bluntly put, I want to believe they're being entirely genuine about it, and I don't have reason to believe that those we've spoken to aren't. At the very least, they believe what they're saying to be true, and for the time being we're going to have to accept that.

At the same time, I dislike a fair amount of the things we've discovered when we've been sent out of the city en masse, willingly or otherwise.

as do i

[ ...hmm. ]

speaking of those areas outside of the city...
do you so suppose those have always been there, since time immaterial?
or are they proof of Retrospec's attempts at restoration? that is to say, perhaps those are the beginnings of worlds from employees' memories
seeing as at least one of them is similar to us, i would not be surprised in the slightest to find there was a larger group

I know that both Mr. Carlisle and Wendy are in a similar situation to us; with regards to those other regions...well, I certainly don't recall them being there before? Which I understand isn't precisely the best litmus to use here for a number of reasons, but it's odd that they would just suddenly be there, if that's the case. I'd be willing to believe they're part of some restoration attempt or another.

then, following that logic:
do you suppose pieces of our world that we recall may also begin to appear?
well, things like that have already happened in a way...
but i suppose i mean larger, potentially more dangerous pieces. a tower of monsters, for instance

[...dear god.]

I genuinely hope not.

[ are you saying you don't want to endlessly grind in tartarus ]

is it that bad in your memories, then?

[ ...the text does not convey the level of sympathy in her tone, but trust that it is there because elizabeth is a kind young woman ]

[i mean probably not but that also made it occur to him that this could end in like

the tricell tanker topped with fifty feet of uroboros aheri just rocking up to pesgare one day]

It is, yes.

[ recolle the zombie game 2k18 ]

my apologies.
while mine is quite
not-normal, it wouldn't say it's terrible

[ but that's because she doesn't know about apathy syndrome. or that the only way to get rid of it was by sealing away a giant fucking monster with someone she's fond of's life. or that every year she has to go fight some other giant fuckass monster to keep that person safe in the sea of human unconsciousness.

did you know: liz doesn't know JACK SHIT about persona 3]

[someone convince me this is a bad idea, i need an adultier adult than me]

A fair amount of the reason the world I'm remembering is so terrible is due to my own actions. So it isn't as though I deserve the condolences.

[ quietly cheers "zombie plague! zombie plague! zombie plague!"

if it isn't wesker it's someone apping from the walking dead to regain cordyceps so i mean ]

oh, i see
...i won't retract them regardless, simply because they must be awful memories to have
you've hardly ever seemed like a villain in our interactions, after all
in fact, i find you quite good company

[bella........

...that said, he. isn't entirely sure what to do with that? there's something of a pause, at least.]

Likewise, of course. It's appreciated.

[ ...not the walking dead the uh

what's the other fucking zombie game

the last of us

that's the one

holy shit why did so many happen in the same five years ]

of course.

i do hope you have some happy memories, however
and if not, then you can at least find joy in the ones you have made here

[for what it's worth, i saw nothing wrong with that]

I do have some positive memories. The ones that have been made here are better, however.

[ thank you so much. ]

i'm glad to hear that then, and i hope you make many more as well
perhaps it's poor of me to say, but i do find this life more important than the one i may have lived previously...
they're important in their own ways, that is, but the one that matters (the people that matter) are the ones i have met in this life

I don't know how to classify it, personally; the life I have here is infinitely more relevant to me as a person, and I'm hesitant to say that there's anything more important than this, either...

Just the same, it's difficult for me to quantify my relationship to my past life. I suppose it's something I'll have to consider more.

005. Text // my world is unaffected

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