2/6; 8AM

[jurai]

[Hey Retrospec, I hope you're having a good morning. And if you aren't, well...there's kitty posters that are designed to deal with just that. Hang in there, buckos. But for those of you that ARE, Crow's going to take to the network.

You know those traits that are all the craze and amplifying themselves? Well Crow's got em full swing, and his desire to help out his younger friends overpowers all else--in both everyday life and love lives. Unfortunately, it feeds right into his own self destructive behavior, so...

Signed in as BIG DECK ENERGY:]

Hey Retrospec-ers!

It's February, and you know what that means? Smmmoochessss? Hand holding. Candle light dinners~

It's a whole month dedicated to finding Mr. or Ms. Right, and with Valentine's day right smack in the center of the month, it's even generous enough to give you 2 weeks to buy discount candy. What could be better?

Well I'll tell ya

How about a date with my buddy, Rean Schwarzer? The guy had a pretty rough month in January and he's a little too shy to get out into the world and meet someone

He's about 5'8'', black hair, pretty good looking if I had to judge myself... He'll talk to you about anything and everything, and personality's got a little kick to it, if you're looking for excitement

Contact for more details

LATER!

Comments

[jurai]

Uh huh

And what would yours say that would charm the ladies and gents? Hypothetically

If you cared

[godcards]

I am not writing a Tinder profile for you.

[jurai]

...


Can I write it? Just for kicks?

[godcards]

If you want to write a bio for yourself, who am I to stop you?

[jurai]

Aw but doing it for others is more fun


Let's see...for you I'd put

Don't bite AS much as he looks like he does

[godcards]

What does that even mean??

[jurai]

It means you have the personality of an agitated cat

You know

In the nicest way possible

[godcards]

Uh huh... Right. I don't agree with you. Besides, it's not like anyone goes on Tinder to find someone with personality. That's the last thing you should be writing about.

[jurai]

Oh, more of a dog person?

Wait, have you been on Tinder? Aren't you like 18?

[godcards]

Not really.

I've been on the internet a lot longer than just a month. I don't need Tinder, but that doesn't mean I don't know how it works. Plenty of people post about their horror stories from there, or make jokes about it.

[jurai]

Point taken, there's whole sites about bad Tinder experiences

I never really used it either, all my numbers came from the girls I met here

[godcards]

Then why get on my case about it? Do you think you’re trying to protect my innocence? Haha...

Anyway, that still supports my claim that appearance is more important than personality.

[jurai]

Hey, hey, I wasn't on your case, just surprised

What you do in the privacy of your aggressively teenage life is no business of an old man like me

[godcards]

You’re surprised a teenager knows how to use the internet...? That’s stupid.

Although, in case you forgot, I am technically an adult.

[jurai]

Don't twist my words, you know I meant dating apps

Besides

You still have to nail down acting like an adult ❤️

[godcards]

I’m doing better than you in some areas already, old man.

Like I said... There’s a reason I don’t need to use sites like Tinder. :)

[jurai]

[Stop that, he's already dealing with his trashfire of a love life as it is.]

No way

Really?


CONGRATS AND NEVER LET GO CAUSE I DON'T THINK ANYONE ELSE MEETS THAT RARE 1% CRITERIA TO DATE YOU

[godcards]

[ nah he’s gotta take those shots when he can ]

Well, you have that much right... I am very particular. But as you can see, I know what I’m talking about when it comes to these things.

[jurai]

That's certainly

One way to read what I wrote

[More like 'Well there's always SOMEONE out there crazy enough to date a weirdo like you'.]

So since you've got a SO, spill, what are YOUR plans for ol' V-Day?

[godcards]

[ that’s not wrong. ]

A date to an undetermined location, probably. We aren’t a classic dinner and candles kind of couple. And we don’t plan for days like this ahead of time. Contrived holidays aren’t our favorite, so we just do whatever we feel like.

[jurai]

Ah, kinda just see what comes to you and work from there?

Well, I can't blame ya. There's something to be said about gettin burgers and eatin' em on the sidewalk

You know

As an example

[godcards]

What, did you want to steal ideas from me for your little loveless friend? Sorry to disappoint... Even if I did have it pre-planned, I would't be giving details anyway. That's my own private matter.

[jurai]

Don't break your arm patting yourself on the back

Rean really doesn't need help in that area




I was just being a nosey little uncle

[godcards]

Nice excuse, but the damage has already been done. But oh well, that's for you and him to work out. I couldn't care less about any of this.

[jurai]

Alright Sir Not-Cares-a-Lot

Make sure you have fun on your date and remember

Only praying mantises eat the heads of their loved ones