musings about turkey ass stuffings

[parodeity]

hey yo its dave again
i mean if you dont know me
if you do my glorious red text gave me away
i just have like
a few things
first off who here has super speed and also a sword
the number has to be greater than like five i assume
there are so many ppl with swords
sword analogues also work
looking for a training partner

second off im pretty sure cell service is getting worse and that sucks

but most importantly
well most importantly is the training thing im serious about that
but also i have made a holiday appropriate comic for everyone to enjoy



anyway
what is even up with thanksgiving food
like delicious turkey ass stuffings aside
does anyone actually like cranberry sauce
or is it like a conspiracy for someone to be able to bring a thing
which then no one eats or like
please feel free to discuss
like haha we all like cousin bob
but fuck if he isnt the worst cook in the world
better tell him he can bring the cranberry sauce
be a contributing member of thanksgiving society
supposedly
only really its all a RUSE
not a sock ruse though
yeah no ones gonna get that
this was mostly to find a partner
and suggest that we all make use of the cell service thing while its around
etc
later

Comments

[fabrefactions]

[ breathe in

breathe out

don't focus on the art yusuke you're a strong young man. ]

I do not have super speed, but I was gifted a sword the other month by Retrospec.
And aside from some bizarre muscle memory type instinct, I have no idea what I'm doing with it.

[ send help. ]

[parodeity]

want me to teach you?
ive been doing this since like
march

[thesettingsun]

Are scythes sword analogues, and also what the hell is that comic even.

[parodeity]

a work of fucking art
and yeah scythes work
you have your magic one right
can you swing it around better now

[robitussin]

okay there's a lot to tackle here but first

jesus christ how did cranberry sauce hurt you

[parodeity]

counterpoint how did aj hurt you
do we need to draw diagrams and show one another where we got hurt here

[frisyr]

I really like cranberry sauce...

[parodeity]

tbh its like coconut
you like it or you dont

[tarotcards]

I'm here if you need a training partner.

And what's wrong with cranberry sauce?

[parodeity]

i def need one
potentially someone i dont need to speed cap with would be nice

also its just
idk
maybe its the canned shit but it just doesnt wow me you know
food should wow you or something

[optimistical]

Nice update! I missed reading your comics.

This reminds me. I have an assignment for one of my classes to analyze a webcomic and to interview the creator about it. Can I use your comic for my class?

[parodeity]

are you serious
fuck yes you can
ill even draw you an original for your analyzing thing if you want

[windeity]

are you mad that thanksgiving uses cranberry sauce instead of apple sauce?
also i appreciate this more than rose's history lesson at least, but dude.

[John shut up, this is unfortunately fine.]

[grimdeity]

Wow, John.
I'm hurt.
I realize my brother's an art virtuoso comparable to none, but I thought my history lessons were at least decent.

[feistytrader]

Cranberries are terrible period. They might just be the on the lowest tier of fruits.

[parodeity]

im promoting you up the friendship chain for having my back here
like
wow apparently we have a lot of cranstans on the network
we didnt even know we were surrounded

[grimdeity]

4.5/5 stars.
The execution falls a little flat for me.

[parodeity]

i demand to know exactly where in the execution i lost my half a point

[elevelvetor]

the friend that helped us with the piranhas a few months ago uses a sword, but i don't know if you'd want to fight him...
more importantly, however
no, in fact, the most important thing of this post:
cranberry is incredibly delicious, Dave, especially when prepared properly.

[parodeity]

id be down for it if he was honestly
also maybe ive just never had them prepared properly then?
admittedly ive mostly had like
canned ones

[okitactless]

how super is super

[parodeity]

i can move fast enough to make people think im teleporting
so
id like someone who can handle that?

[lesinset]

cranberry sauce is lazy
but useful start for tarts, pies and an assortment of creams
also have you tried them used as a glaze with apple roses
and i know at least three hot drinks to make with cranberries
and apples

also r u sure we even live in a world
and not a worm hole

[parodeity]

no im not sure about that we might live in a wormhole

but tell me more about these apple based recipes
are they secrets

[floret]

Thank you for the comic!
Exactly what did the second gentleman tell the first about turkey holes?

[parodeity]

not to put his head in the turkey hole

[usurpers]

what happened with the turkey hole

[parodeity]

he wanted to put his head in it

[stopbleeding]

we're gonna need a safer place to fight.

[parodeity]

i usually do rooftops but
like
the woods?

[compendiem]

Ever thought about translating to other languages to share with the rest of the world? I could do Japanese if you provide the transcript.

[ aka G O D the jpeg is so terrible, I have no idea what half of those words say and this is my roundabout way of asking. ]

[parodeity]

left to right
i cant wait to eat this turky with ass stuffing
the turkey hole smells delicious
i warned you about turky bro
i am all about turky asses
i told you man
i told you about turkey holes

[gudaguda]

i have super speed

well i say super speed but i'm fast for a human i guess

and you know i have a sword so we can fight sure

[parodeity]

if youre down just say when and where tbh

[alitaba]

what if i like jellied cranberry sauce
does that even count
it's good on rice though

[parodeity]

i can genuinely say thats a thing ive never had
how is it different

[windowdressing]

[ he just... looks at that jpeg for a few seconds and decides not to acknowledge it ]

I think it depends on the type of cranberry sauce. Whole berry makes a nice garnish, but the jellied kind that looks like beet slices is... less desirable.

In my opinion, anyway.

[ ok maybe he has a grudge against it because he mistook some canned beets for it once as a kid ]

[parodeity]

ive never tried anything but the jellied kind
so
maybe that explains why i dont like it according to the cranberry stans?

[kagepuro]

david thats weird

[parodeity]

[ he debates trying to get her to call him by his name again, but even though “david” continues to make him uncomfortable he can’t bring himself to. sigh. ]

yeah thanks