retrospec | (no subject)

Christmas Song Hall of Shame

Brought to you by my boss, who has been playing nothing but Christmas music for a week straight.

This is not a song, this is some sort of subliminal brainwashing. Maybe I'm not having a wonderful Christmas time, but I sure am hearing it repeat in my head for every waking moment of the rest of my life.

It's not even the first day of Christmas yet. Your true love has a horrible taste in gifts if you can't tell us what they got you in less than four minutes.

On what qualifications are we saying it's the most wonderful time of the year? It's freezing. Everything is sold out as people scramble to pick it up for Christmas Presents. Customers everywhere are stupider and more entitled than usual. I'd say it's a hellscape, but it's too damn cold.

Rudolph got bullied by all of his friends for looking different until he was useful to them. They couldn't even come up with a second verse for this song. I'd like to know about Rudolph's claim to fame and sudden inspiration from Cee Lo Green. Actually, here's a pallet cleanser.

This one isn't too bad but it gets a special mention anyway.

[Looks like he's not explaining that one.]

Here's a pitch for a new Christmas song. "All I Want For Christmas Is An All Expenses Paid Tropical Vacation." I'd like to taste things again, too, but that's not a unique or Christmas targeted complaint.

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That's

You're early.

[But hey look, Akira got him to shut the hell up about Christmas-]

it's okay. you'll be receiving more cat gifs as a countdown.

feeling better?

Well said. I can't say that I disagree with any of your assessments. In fact, I'd like to add one of my own.

This song irritates me to no end. Did Mr. Crosby not know how to properly RSVP?! He says you can 'plan on' his being home for Christmas, but then he turns around and implies that he might only be home for Christmas in his dreams! Which is it supposed to be, Crosby? Are we to expect you, or not?

Edited 2017-12-03 00:02 (UTC)

Maybe. Try more cat gifs.

do you really want more?

Maybe it's trying to convey his desire to be there despite life or prior engagements, but if that's the case, why use so much definite language? Don't leave that kind of thing up to interpretation.

Give me the best you've got.

Good to see that between this and the responses to Retrospec, the pointlessly surly children are out in full force this weekend.

Well, it seems like you're having fun! Don't expect the music to stop any time soon, though~! ☆

December brings that out in people. Besides, I'm always pretty pointless.

No moreso than any other time of year, really.

Besides, you're usually the one shouting at people to not be so cynical.

I know better than to expect a miracle from one of Santa's handpicked elves.

Usually.

Did I insult one of your favorites?

Thanks for the compliment~! But really, why are you so bothered by these songs?

Can you pick up some more lights? The kitchen needs some more color.

My points aside, it's probably all the Christmas.

[ ....... ]

if you wished for me to stop singing, Silver, you could have simply asked

You hate Christmas that much? Why?

You've made enough of an atrocity out of our apartment already.

How dare you. It's called being in the spirit of the holidays, and be thankful I didn't wake you for the initial decorating.
Bring home a wreath, then. I want to put it on our door. Make sure it's large and pretty.

[...Well, he offers a link, at least...]

He's a Grinch.

[...Don't call him out like this-]

There's nothing wrong with your singing.
If Goro can put Christmas decorations everywhere, you go ahead and sing as much as you want.

Holiday cheer wasn't something covered in our lease. You'll have to find a wreath somewhere else.

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