02 ; text

[odasaku]

Has anyone here formed an opinion on their past (or other) self? Is it positive or is it negative? If negative, how do you deal with it?

Comments

[floret]

I haven't really remembered all that much about him yet, so I don't feel that I can draw any accurate conclusions about what he was like. But . . . I do feel somewhat uneasy about him.

[odasaku]

I think that's natural.

[floret]

You do??

[ what has he heard?? ]

[odasaku]

I do.

[ he's also offering no explanation???? ]

[floret]

Well . . .
I guess it's possible that he had a really good reason, you know?

[odasaku]

Maybe. But there's nothing wrong with feeling uneasy about a past life you know almost nothing about.

[floret]

Oh!!
Yes! That's true.

I thought maybe you knew something specific about my past self, and you were commenting on that. lol

[odasaku]

No, I don't. Sorry.

[floret]

Oh, no. That's perfectly fine. To be honest, I don't think he was that interesting to begin with.

Ummm, what about yours?

[odasaku]

I wasn't a good person so I don't think it's worth talking about.

[floret]

Oh.

Are only good people worth talking about?

[odasaku]

Oh. I phrased it bad. Sorry, that's not what I meant.

[ what he meant was: I'm not worth talking about. ]

[floret]

Well, it's fine if you just don't want to talk about it.

If it helps, I think I might have been a pretty bad person, too.

[ why would that help.......... ]

[odasaku]

You don't know that for sure. Don't judge yourself too harshly until you know enough.

[ but he's doing the same thing to himself??? long live hypocrisy. of course, odasaku does it with good intentions-- he doesn't think that people should treat themselves like that. he's just the only exception to the rule. ]

[floret]

But how can I tell when I do know enough? I mean, how can any of us tell?

[odasaku]

I don't think there's any way to tell.

[floret]

Then that goes for you, too, right? We all kind of have Schrödinger's ethics . . .

[odasaku]

A paradox, huh? I don't know much about them, but I feel you're not wrong about that.

[floret]

It's strange to feel so alienated from someone who's supposedly me.
But maybe that's natural. It's not like I can ask him questions. It's hard to feel any connection to someone you can't talk with or get to know.

[odasaku]

Yeah, maybe.

[ and yet it feels so surreal when he feels the same emotions as his past self, when that guy's pains become his own. because, in those moments, it's not just someone else with his face but himself. ]

It's like an out of body experience.

[floret]

Have you had a lot of them?

Recovered memories.

[odasaku]

Probably not. Only like five.

[floret]

Unless you were mistreating puppies and orphans in all of them, isn't it too early for you to be judging yourself so harshly?