002 - Octopus's Garden In the Shade

[thebeastwithout]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[Today on the hot mess that is Retrospec, somebody's either fallen asleep on their keyboard or allowed their cat to play with the computer for too long, 'cause there's a solid string of this for about a minute straight.]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Garfield Logan added 3 new photos - in Huntington Avenue, Recollé
2 mins

[The first photo is a blurry image of Gar screaming, with only his head and upper chest visible. Something long and twisty is visible at the edge of the frame.

The second is a slightly less blurry image of a... realistic-looking octopus tentacle, for some reason.

The last is an image of Gar's bare chest underneath a ripped shirt, which no one ever really wanted to see, but we're all being traumatized today so just go with it. Everything looks normal up until the part where his shoulder attaches to the octopus tentacle in the previous picture.

It's kinda gross.]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Comments

[maidofmistakes]

Like a non-gross animal? What's a non-gross animal? Dog? Try dog.

[thebeastwithout]

awwwww puppy
ok i can do puppies
i can do this!
i have... super arm changing super powers and i have total control over whatever this is and i'm not doomed to be an octopus-cockroach!!!

[maidofmistakes]

Yeah! I hope so. I mean, past me apparently knew a guy who turned into a dinosaur, turning your arm into stuff should be easy. Hey, maybe that was how you flew that one time!

[thebeastwithout]

oh man turning into a dinosaur would be rad
is that like a real superpower
can i actually do that

ditch the puppies i'm going pterodactyl i know exactly what those look like!

[it is a testament to how much gar cares about dinosaurs that he can spell pterodactyl correctly
a second testament is made evident shortly after]

oh craaaaaaaaaaaaaap

[maidofmistakes]

Oh, no
Did I break it?

[thebeastwithout]

no THIS IS GREAT WAIT

[in a few moments, Kara gets a picture of Beast Boy holding up a glorious pterodactyl wing]

LOOK IT SWITCHED AGAIN

[maidofmistakes]

Nice! Maybe you can turn it into just about anything you want! I'm glad you're getting more control. I think.

[thebeastwithout]

iT'S WORKINg

hold on i'm gonna call you typing is taking too long!!

[the phone rings about zero seconds later]

Kara?!

[maidofmistakes]

Huh? Oh, hey, did you fix your arm?

[thebeastwithout]

No it's still a wing. But that's great!

...I mean, it doesn't fix any of my problems, but this is way better! I've got a giant wing! ...Maybe I can jump off a building and actually fly now!

[maidofmistakes]

Wait, do you need two wings? What if you break something?

[thebeastwithout]

Do I need two wings?

...Yeah, maybe. What if I just like, stick a parachute on my other arm or something? Or a big piece of cloth.

[maidofmistakes]

I guess. ...Maybe I should come. I mean, past me could fly, right?

[thebeastwithout]

Huh? OK, well -- then you can catch me if I fall! One wing is probably plenty!

[gar can always be counted on to make the worst decisions at every possible juncture]

Wait, I still have to get this by my parents without them noticing... Maybe I should just sneak out a window.