002 - Octopus's Garden In the Shade

[thebeastwithout]

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[Today on the hot mess that is Retrospec, somebody's either fallen asleep on their keyboard or allowed their cat to play with the computer for too long, 'cause there's a solid string of this for about a minute straight.]

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Garfield Logan added 3 new photos - in Huntington Avenue, Recollé
2 mins

[The first photo is a blurry image of Gar screaming, with only his head and upper chest visible. Something long and twisty is visible at the edge of the frame.

The second is a slightly less blurry image of a... realistic-looking octopus tentacle, for some reason.

The last is an image of Gar's bare chest underneath a ripped shirt, which no one ever really wanted to see, but we're all being traumatized today so just go with it. Everything looks normal up until the part where his shoulder attaches to the octopus tentacle in the previous picture.

It's kinda gross.]

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Comments

[thebeastwithout]

you just said you would do anything to help!!
man talk about insincere
fine just like
tell me that i'm gonna start a new society of tentacle people and we're gonna do great and i'm not gonna have to live as a sewer monster forever

[digthefuzz]

dude!
i didn't think i'd have to say that 'anything' doesn't include cutting you up!

but um yeah sure why not?
you're gonna start a new society of tentacle people and you'll do great
in fact, it'll be tenta-cool!

[thebeastwithout]

what
is that a pocket creatures pun
c'mon man that's so elementary school






if you still play though i need a version exclusive from indigo, just saying

anyway

i guess i should try to hide this or something

[digthefuzz]

oh maybe
i was just thinking general tentacle puns
but if the tentacle fits!

what if you just put a glove on the tip of it?
i bet no one will tell the difference!

[thebeastwithout]

...
...
...


are you for serious man

like

really

[digthefuzz]

what
am i wrong

[thebeastwithout]

well
ok sure
but my arm isn't usually rubbery and maroon and covered with suckers so i feel like there might still be a small difference

[digthefuzz]

long sleeves
bam, problem solved!

[thebeastwithout]

and if someone touches my arm or my hand?

[digthefuzz]

don't let them! stand up for yourself!
i dunno if they could feel much from a sleeve anyway
touching the glove might be a problem!

[thebeastwithout]

i'll slap 'em in the face with my rubbery arm
that'll show 'em

[digthefuzz]

yeah! you show 'em gar!
you got this!!

[thebeastwithout]

no that was a joke
the point is to not let anyone see the arm

look ok i can like get by with a giant coat for a while but i can't hide it in like, gym class

[digthefuzz]

point taken
maybe say it's a rare skin condition?

[thebeastwithout]

hey yeah i've got octopus leprosy
it's super contagious so don't look at it or touch it

i feel like they'd quarantine me and send me to the government

[digthefuzz]

that's just because you're being too creative
try to think more inside the box
like, say it's just a weird version of goosebumps

[thebeastwithout]

hey yeah i've got octopus bumps
it turns me red and sucker-y but don't worry it only happens when i'm cold so i'm gonna keep this coat on during gym class

[digthefuzz]

you got this

[thebeastwithout]

really
do you think anyone's gonna buy that

[digthefuzz]

maybe???
sometimes the normal people here seem really gullibke
only time will tell??

[thebeastwithout]

well
ok
if you never see me again it's cause they carted me off to get dissected

[digthefuzz]

none of us are gonna let that happen, g-meister

[thebeastwithout]

are you gonna start a rebellion and overthrow the school and lock up all the teachers in the basement

[digthefuzz]

um i was thinking more 'get you out to safety'
than 'take on the entire school and imprison people'

[thebeastwithout]

aw man
are you sure you can't do that
i really think school would be improved if you did that