A wish.

[livingimpaired]

[ The Holy Grail. He does not recall exactly what it is, but from what he gathers from the brief memory with the "King of Heroes," it is something to wish upon. And Kei's other self would allow that man to "wish for death." What does that mean? No, he understands it simply, but there is more said and unsaid than he can unravel. ]

With all this business going on, some frivolousness ponderings might be an enjoyable distraction.

Well, then. If you could wish for anything, what would it be? [ A pause. Kei thinks of sending it like that yet he feels that may be too telling. Too telling of what? He's uncertain, but adds more to cover up his uncertainty. ] Though, with Valentine's Day is coming, most are thinking of just wishing for someone to spend that day with, hm? :)

Comments

[drydrown]

...Please tell me you realize that people can be displeased with a situation without assuming that anyone responsible for the situation is an evil person.

[livingimpaired]

I don't recall saying that I thought you were an evil person. Why do you think that I am calling you such?

[drydrown]

Ah, no, that isn't what I meant. You seem to be having difficulty comprehending the reasoning at play here without assuming some sort of good/evil dichotomy exists. I don't find anyone involved in the situation I want to leave to be evil - I don't believe anyone at Retrospec to be evil, and honestly for all I know they're perfectly acceptable people, albeit accidentally cruel ones sometimes.

The reason I want to leave this behind is primarily that it fails to benefit me in any way to stay. That's the true nature of humanity, in my opinion - neither good nor evil, but merely acting in their own self-interest. Most of the time that self-interest is what results in all this appearance of inherent good that you're mentioning - it's in one's best interests to play nice with others, doing so reaps benefit. This particular situation is causing more problems than it's solving, and as such I want to leave. It's that simple.

[livingimpaired]

Ah, I see. My talk about humanity has made you a little confused as to why I asked you are running away. I apologize. I merely speaking as someone who is an advocate for humanity and the society that it has created -- since it sounded to me like it has been forgotten.

The explanation doesn't change my initial assessment, unfortunately. But I cannot solve the problem that you're not quite facing. I can only say that the situation is solvable from what I've come to know.

[drydrown]

In fairness, you're also assuming I care any about your assessment to begin with...? I'm discussing this to pass time, your opinion is trending toward the general response of "that's nice, dear heart, now show me where I asked."

[livingimpaired]

Trending toward, but not yet there, right? Also, I'd rather not be called "dear heart." Unless you've fallen for me? If so, I can honestly say please find better taste in men.

[drydrown]

Oh, do love yourself a little more than that, you're going to make me feel sorry for you.

Your fragile masculinity has my apologies, however, it won't happen again.

[livingimpaired]

I refuse.

Is it fragile? I merely don't like affectionate nicknames.

[drydrown]

Whether it's fragile or not, it is being at least somewhat baffling right now - is there a reason you refuse to be nice to yourself outside of being contrary?

[livingimpaired]

I don't like myself, but I don't hate myself. That's all there is to it.

[drydrown]

...No one utterly lacks an opinion on themselves.

[livingimpaired]

And I don't.

The way that I am isn't something that makes me happy or unhappy. It isn't anything that I like, but it isn't anything that I dislike since I am not suffering in any way due to it. I have such a painfully nihilistic view on life that I refuse to praise anything about myself.

But I'm also told I'm one of the most positive people others know. So, there's that.

[drydrown]

...So dislike is something that's solely reserved for that which causes suffering?

[livingimpaired]

Only in terms of personalities and actions. Though, I would change "dislike" to "hate" in that case.

[drydrown]

Hopefully you aren't in for any unfortunate surprises from your past life, then.

[livingimpaired]

[ BOY-- ]

I already had some, but I believe that I am on the path to correcting a few actions that lead to the unfortunate surprises.

[drydrown]

...Charming.

Best of luck with it, I suppose.

[livingimpaired]

Thank you for your insincere regards. I appreciate them all the same.

[drydrown]

I don't know what you expected. A fair amount of us were absolute winners in our past lives.

[livingimpaired]

I'm aware.

I don't expect sympathy or pity, at the very least. I'm only commenting on my own situation, and so there's no real need for you to do anything to console me on it. As I said, my nihilistic view on life is a negative even to myself.

[drydrown]

Take it as a formality, then, because it's a bit odd to say nothing.

[livingimpaired]

Are you feeling well?

I haven't known you long, but you seem like the sort that wouldn't worry about social constraints when speaking to an irritating person.

[drydrown]

It depends on the sort of annoyance, honestly.

[livingimpaired]

Have I leveled-up somehow?

[drydrown]

More like you're nowhere near the most irritating thing I've dealt with, and as such professional social courtesy can still be afforded, at least.

If you're trying to ensure that I won't bother at all, you're going to have to try a little harder. It was a valiant attempt, however. ♡