[text]

[matchbreaker]

[ It's ass at night and Elda Marker, made more awake by the fact she keeps finding herself waking up later and later especially on weekends when her son doesn't have school is wide awake. As such, she makes her own variation on one of those cerebral posts a friend of hers makes sometimes: ]

So what's something you've wanted to tell someone, but haven't? Or something you absolutely don't want to tell someone? Or have been fretting about? I'm no qualified therapist, but I am older than many of the people on this app, so maybe I can help. Even if I can't, I can hear it out.

I'll make mine public: The woman in my memories survived an attempt to exterminate her race, and I have no idea how to begin to handle that memory. I've tried to ignore it for months.

Mine's related to Retrospec stuff, but it doesn't have to be obviously.

[ On and OOC feel free to have your responses here assumed to be to her inbox for privacy if you want or have them be public for people. Specify if you want I'll roll with whatever ... or respond to her own admission if you want ]

Comments

[heritrix]

It'd be interesting to find out. I'll have to remember to check someday.

Anyways. Did a lot of people take you up on this? There's like no visible replies, so I guess you got a ton of private messages instead.

[matchbreaker]

Yeah, despite Becket's poo-pooing, I did get a few people willing to respond somehow or another.

[heritrix]

Good!
Er. Probably?
Depends on what everyone decided to talk about, but hopefully it wasn't all heavy.

[matchbreaker]

Admittedly I probably set the tone too dark, I did get a lot of heavier things.

[heritrix]

[Oh. Rin feels glad she changed her mind at the last minute, then.

A few seconds pass, and then:]

User:Rin_Tohsaka shared an image:

[matchbreaker]

Aawwww, that's so cute!

But seriously girl if you've got anything you wanted to say, don't let whatever I've read stop you.

[heritrix]

[!!! Don't see through her like that!]

Hey, I already confessed my deepest darkest secret!
Seriously; carelessly letting slip you don't like Beyoncé's music is the kind of thing that can get you mugged, don't tell anyone.

[matchbreaker]

It's true, I did hear once in some youtube video she has marauding fans. Of course I think it might've been an Infowars thing!

But if that's the extent of your worries, then I'm glad.

[heritrix]

[Mm...]

Out of curiosity, though, why did you volunteer yourself to listen to other people's problems like that?
It sounds like you've been carrying your own burdens. A pretty heavy one, even. Hearing out everyone else's concerns can't have made you feel better.

[matchbreaker]

It's threefold, I suppose.

I hoped it might make me feel better (but you're right, it didn't at all, really, about that).

I've made myself a public figure anyway between the whole guide thing and putting my name on Minako's registry, so I wanted to follow through on that.

But mostly...

I have two children. One of them is on the app, one of them used to be but isn't anymore. Neither of them are the most open people, and I worry sometimes I haven't done enough for them. So maybe I'm also pushing past my guilt for that.

[heritrix]

[...she's reminded of a conversation she had with Kei not long ago, about the people who were once on the app but then vanished from it, forgetting everything.

Rin told him then she thought the people who still remembered everything after Retrospec would have it much worse. And well, here's Elda month's later, proof of that.]

I'm sorry. That has to be hard on you.
I don't really know enough about your situation to comment on it, but if it's eating at you that much, maybe you should talk it over with him? Your child that's still on Retrospec.

[matchbreaker]

Trust me, I have.

It's a delicate situation, so there's no need to bore you with the details. It's about as complicated as every child-parent relationship inevitably is. I'm sure yours is with your folks, right?

[heritrix]

Ugh, that's no exaggeration. Point taken.

[matchbreaker]

See?

So it really all sums up as me being a busy-body here in the early morning. If you wanted to flatter me you could call it maternal.

[heritrix]

Well, you've always seemed like that, from our limited interactions.

[A busybody, that is.]

I mean, you kind of followed me into the subway that one time, even though it was no business of yours.

[matchbreaker]

I'd be pretty irresponsible if I let some young woman like yourself get injured doing something crazy.