[TEXT] It's a quarter after 1 I'm a little drunk and what were the next lyrics?

[devilsadvocato]

[Sometimes Mr. Nelson's students forget their teacher is on the network. This time Mr. Nelson forgot his students were on the network. This message brought to you by a stressed middle aged man drinking WAY TOO MANY shots late Friday night.]

Say you and the guy you have feelings for agree to stay just friends because even though he feels the same way about you he's not comfortable dating other guys yet. You two continue hanging out and get even closer and the next thing you know you're regularly meeting for movie night and having serious heart to heart conversations with each other. Best friends fuck yeah!

But then things start to get into a very very grey territory where you're doing things friends don't normally do. Like cuddling up to each other or spooning and you might have laid one on him once or twice. Also people start thinking you're not single because back in FEB your stupid heart stone convinced like half the kids you teach that you're madly in love with someone and getting married any day now- THEIR WORDS not mine. Sure you haven't said those special words directly to him but you're getting very serious about him and he keeps alluding to being very serious about you. And you don't want to force anyone to rush into something they're not ready for but you're turning down dates when others ask you out because it feels like you have a boyfriend even though you don't.

Where do you draw the line between "I'm respecting your wishes to say we're just friends because you're not comfortable with your sexual orientation yet" and "Buddy no matter how many times we call each other dude and pal it's crazy to say we're not dating at this point"????

I asked the bartender and they looked at me like I was insane.

Comments

[devilsadvocato]

As long as you make human contact you can't completely avoid it.
Learn from my mistakes.
Don't mix alcohol with social media.

[redarm]

when i graduate im gonna be a mountain man
problem fucking solved.

[he's semi-joking with that, but ew people. Anyway...]

anyway i knew a guy once that had a real thing for goats
like a real thing for goats.
you should tell your not-boyfriend to relax about his orientation
cause at least it doesnt involve goats
so its whatever.

[IS HE HELPING?????]

[devilsadvocato]

Are you going on a spiritual journey of self-discovery?

Funny you should say that. Earlier this month my not-boyfriend told me his favorite animal is a goat.
Wait the dude you're talking about isn't in Recolle is he?

[redarm]

sure.

no this was back in the circus.
you should probably check how much a favorite goats are with your not-boyfriend though.

[devilsadvocato]

Good for you! I hope you find all the answers to your deep questions about life. YEAH!

OK no he is not from the circus even though he is very talented.
Noooo he's above that he's a good person.
I believe in him
He's not a goat kisser. God no! I don't want to even imagine!
😨😨😨

[redarm]

sounds like you having doubts
you should probably ask him
just to be sure.

[devilsadvocato]

Hey why not
I have to talk to him.
This will make a hilarious opener right?
It would be a huge-ass waste if he was a goat kisser.
He's beautiful. Seriously steal-your-breath crazy hot! [OH NO MR. NELSON DON'T START]
All that wasted on goats? That would be a tragedy!

[redarm]

..........
well
im not gonna have any trouble finding things to talk about with my therapist this week.

[devilsadvocato]

What?
You haven't told them about the goat thing from the circus yet?
Or are you going EW at the fact I'm in love?
Dude cooties aren't real fyi.
Your teachers have lives and emotions like anybody else.

[redarm]

yeah but that doesnt mean their students should be subjected to the DETAILS.

[devilsadvocato]

What? I don't go EW at all the teenage romantic entanglements I witness on a regular basis! [FOGGY NO DON'T CONTINUE THIS CONVERSATION]

[redarm]

[FOGGY NO. Luckily Noah here is ready to be the mature, sensible one and take action before this gets worse]

im hanging up for both our sakes.

[SIGNS OFF]

[devilsadvocato]

[Foggy frowns at his phone and the logged off notice. RUDE!

He'll regret it all when he's sober and act like it never happened if Noah let's him get away with it.]

[redarm]

[ It'll be Foggy's lucky day. Noah will be trying real hard to forget that his English teacher started telling him about his thirst.

Just don't mind the total lack of eye contact and embarrassed looks around Foggy for the next few days. ]