retrospec | (no subject)

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Whoa...the post settings from the admin accounts are really different than the normal accounts.

I'm sure you're expecting Jo or Maury or one of the others but those are all people who are way smarter and way more qualified than me, and those people are working overtime to trace down a signal we keep picking up on. Not sure what it means yet, but I'm hoping for the best. We thought we were able to isolate the problem when the other regions appeared on the current layer but it's something deeper.

But hey, isn't that what we're all trying to do here? Hope for the best.

Call me curious, but what's your favorite color? I've been teaching myself color theory lately. Bonus points if you say "why", too.

Zee Carlisle
Hiring Manager
Retr

spec Incorporated

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Of course it's terrifying the first time.

[but really, she felt like she had a good idea of the experience. that whole thing with Freya could have broken very badly because there was absolutely no way she'd had enough strength to lift two of them. she felt the fear of death a few times last month and only thought it was exhilarating.]

I might be willing to do it without wings holding me up. We'll see.

[Lillian grinned.] Good. Cause I'll definitely go again pretty much whenever anyone wants to, so.

[She shifted a bit, turning them down another path, gently tugging Anna by the hand she was still holding.]

I guess it's 'cause of the whole, you know, sick thing...but I've always been lookin' for stuff like that to do. Thrill stuff, I mean. Guess I'm kinda a junky for it now.

[Lillian would've had very few problems leading Anna where she wanted to take her right now, wherever it was. even if this was just a walk in the park that had gotten a little serious.]

Makes sense to me. Adrenaline's way healthier for you than cigarettes. [and as she thought about that, she crossed another person off her mental list of "people it's okay to smoke near". getting smaller by the day.]

Someone from my high school was from Boston and she did all kinds of crazy shit. That city must do stuff to people. [yeah, she'd let herself smirk at that.] Can't imagine what it's like.

[Best Lillian wasn't the sort to take advantage of it.]

Well, until it catches up to you. [Lillian smirked.] Smoking will kill you eventually, but parachute doesn't open and that's all she wrote.

[She laughed at that, a little bounce in her step, their arms swinging between them.]

It can be pretty dull there, so that's probably it. Gotta find somethin' fun to do.

[well, that was a... bright reaction to what she'd just said. then again, for someone like Lillian, maybe it made morbid jokes a little easier to swallow. Anna wasn't exactly into the arm-swinging, but she wasn't going to stop it from happening.]

Sure. And now we live here and we never have to worry about a dull moment ever again. [god, she wished she believed that, even if it was steeped in as much sarcasm as she could manage.]

Christ. Sorry, I think it just hit me again how fast I got used to all this. Even just us being friends and talking like this about a ton of serious shit.

Nah, don't worry about it. I mean, everything is different now. I've always been a fast friend maker but...everything goin' on, the monsters and layers and who knows what else...

[The arm swinging stopped as she shrugged.]

It makes us more desperate for connections, I think. Kinda like how quickly people make friends in hospitals. Shared suffering.

Ha, yeah. That sure as hell is what we're going through.

[she'd never been hospitalized, fortunately, but it made sense. people who knew they had limited time, one way or another. of course they'd get closer faster.]

Hope your sister takes to it the same way. I'm gonna DM her when I have the energy for it. Not to take the focus off you or anything. [said, of course, in the driest tone imaginable.]

Nah, that's a good idea. [Lillian smiled.] Angela needs more friends, ya know? She's very...Mm.

Reserved.

[Lillian laughed.]

Hey! I don't always gotta be the center of attention, ya know.

[Yes she did.]

[OOC: I am sorry for how late this is, life has been very uncooperative the last two weeks. If this is too late to respond to, that's fine!]

Must not run in the family. [she gave Lil a reserved grin. sisters could be so different from one another. not that she'd know herself.]

Sure you don't. That why you wanted me to come out here and talk to you in person? [come on, Anna, you know that's not it. her expression faltered and her tone slipped back towards something softer, away from the sarcasm that tinged most words she spoke.]

I appreciate it. Thanks. [the weight of her slowly drying hair reminded her what she'd forced herself to do before she'd come out here.] I needed a reason to feel like a person again.

((no worries, you're good!!))

Maybe I just wanted you to come out here and talk to me in person because I needed some eye candy on my walk, huh? Ever think of that?

[Lillian laughed, then nodded.]

Hey, sure. Glad it helped. Also, glad you don't smell.

Then get a mirror, you nerd.

[but she laughed, too, glad for the tension to have been shattered over the course of this conversation. she really appreciated Lillian.]

Dude, I live in glorified dorms. Someone's gotta be the showering role model for the building. I show my face in public without showering and it's chaos.

But I don't need a mirror if I convince you to come out here.

[Lillian wrinkled her nose at that.]

Ugh, yeah, I remember the dorms...not my favorite thing. Glad I have an apartment now. [Hm. Don't be too flirty, don't be too flirty...]

Bet a lot of people want to wash your back though, huh?

[Damn it.]

[Anna raised an eyebrow at that. she knew Lillian pretty okay by now and had a guess of what she meant, but she'd never really heard that as an expression before—provided it even was one and she wasn't being completely literal. and actually, now that she thought about it for a second longer... yeah, probably.]

Just coming out the gate with that, huh? [she blew some hair from her face and scoffed.] I don't show people my back. Not as impressive as the front.

[see, she could tell jokes too.]

[Lillian just smiled slyly.]

Eh, way I see it, if the reward's good enough, it's worth the risk, yeah? So why wait.

[Lillian made a point of leaning backwards to look at Anna's 'back', and then straightened up again.]

Oh, I don't know. Looks pretty nice.

Jesus.

[but she wasn't about to stop Lillian from saying nice things about her body. felt nice hearing that from people who weren't her current partner (contractually obligated) or her ex (biased).]

You sure know how to flatter a girl. Makes me want to put push-ups back into my workout. [while she still had human muscles to exercise.] What kind of reward are you angling for? Just an excuse to check out my ass?

Sometimes the reward is just making someone else happy. [Lillian was a simple girl with simple needs.] Ain't a lot of things better than a smile on a beautiful woman.

[She shrugged.]

Also laying the groundwork in case you ever need someone to make out with, you'll think of me.

[A clearly teasing grin.]

Oh my god.

[but yeah, she wasn't surprised. Lillian had been like this since they met, and honestly she wasn't opposed to it—Astin might have had problems with it, though, and that was her main concern. it was something she'd like to discuss with them first if any surreptitious makeouts were to happen.]

You're as bad as Soleil. [there was a slow shake of her head; she was joking, thankfully.] I taste like cigarettes and sadness. You can find better people to kiss.

[God it was fun to make her exclaim like that. Lillian just laughed again, shrugging at that statement.]

Oh I don't know. Cigarettes and sadness has a certain charm to it. [Her smile faded a little.]

And don't say things like that about yourself. You are just as good a kissing target as anyone else.

[What a weird thing to say.]

What the fuck, Astin said the same thing. [about not putting herself down, even if the circumstances were different.] Is everyone part of some massive conspiracy to get me to start thinking I'm a decent human being?

[for as long as she still was one of those, at least. she was being sarcastic, but it did still baffle her a little when people saw worth in her that she couldn't see herself.]

You keep it up and it might actually work.

Yup. We meet every other Tuesday at the Waffle House.

[Said with a completely straight face. And then she smiled.]

Good! I'll let the others know so we can redouble our efforts! [A pause.] Who's Astin?

This gu—person I know. Soleil's sibling.

[she wasn't trying to be dodgy about them; she was just still getting used to nonbinary stuff. but she'd mostly gotten the hang of it, which was a hell of an improvement from where she was before she'd met them.]

We get together and make out sometimes. I don't think it's anything serious. [except, well. see if she still believed that in a few hours.]

Lucky them. [Lillian had caught that correction, though she didn't quite know what to think about it.]

I should found out what their secret is to gettin' you smoochy.

[Clearly teasing.]

[real answer? lots of complicated emotions coming up all at once. the perfect storm of sadness and shots in the dark. it couldn't have happened any other way.]

I don't know. Buy me a few drinks and we'll see what happens.

[that was, uh, not so much of a joke, even if she said it with a little forced lilt in her voice to pretend she was being playful.]

[Lillian had not been expecting that, not even as a joke really and it earned Anna a raised eyebrow and a little smile...a surprised, if excited, smile. Even if she could play it off too.]

I'll keep that in mind.

[She hummed after she said that. Lillian had started to assume her flirting would not get her anywhere, but perhaps there was hope!]

[ha. god, speaking of, though. she might have been feeling a lot better than she had been before Lillian had dragged her out here, but she still had a date with a bottle of Jack and she couldn't keep cancelling on him. maybe she'd take it easier, though.]

Hey, I really appreciate you taking the time to help me out like this. Don't know a lot of people who would. [her pace slowed to a stop and she jerked her head off to the side, in the direction of her apartment.]

I think I'm gonna head home. You ever wanna do something like this again, though, hit up my DMs. I like talking with you.

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