tw: child death talk for this whole post

[spirithacker]

retrospec memory stuff

if you remembered dying
does it ever stop being scary
because its scary right now and i dont know why anyone would want to remember this

or does anyone know how to forget stuff
ill pay you
or do your homework
or something

Comments

[me_matey]

-...-

u in ur room lil dude?

[spirithacker]

y

[me_matey]

do u wanna be alone?

[spirithacker]

no

but it cant be sakura

[cardcaptured]

[Oh jfc Shinji NOT YOU TOO]

The only way to forget the stuff Retrospec gives us is to be taken off the app. And to my knowledge, there's no way to voluntarily do that.

[Not about to mention that dying is another option, since thaaaaat's not the appropriate thing to tell a child who just remembered getting killed??]

... where are you right now? Is someone with you?

[spirithacker]

[Thanks for not telling the small child to die?]

that sucks

mays ship
sakuras here somewhere

[cardcaptured]

[YOU'RE..... WELCOME......]

Sakura? You know her? What's she doing over there?

[Because his Sakura also knows May, and he hasn't met Shinji's Sakura yet, SO....]

[reaquila]

No, it never stops being scary.

Sorry dude.

Are you okay?

[spirithacker]

idk
what would ok be

[reaquila]

Okay meaning you're fine and well?

Shit. Was your memory really that bad?

You can talk to me, Shinji.

[drizzle]

I can't speak of any particular experience since I'm still new, but.
If these memories are anything like having a really vivid dream, then maybe you could try to find something comforting to help you sleep.
Do you by any chance have something that helps you feel safe and protected?
Like a blanket, stuff animal, or favorite pillow?

[spirithacker]

stuffed animals are for little kids
im 9 now

[Too mature for teddy bears, and not mature enough to be able to handle seeing himself die.]

my blankets are @ home
im staying with my cousin rn
since my parents are invisible

[drizzle]

Is it?
Odd.
Looks like me and my plushies missed the memo on that one.

[She can't help it. Wanting to poke the kid a tiny bit. Anything to get him to forget his issues, even for a tiny bit.]

Oh, I see.
That's very sweet of them to take you in.
I did the same for my own cousin too.
Do you get along with them?

[frostythehitman]

yeah it stops being scary after a while
but it doesn't stop being messed up
you're gonna have to get used to it
no one's found a way to forget stuff on purpose
if we had i would've gone for it ages ago already

[spirithacker]

i dont want to have to get used to it
im not supposed to have to deal with serious stuff until im a teenager

[frostythehitman]

[ Oh jesus, younger than a teenager? This is messed up. James thought this was another high schooler or something. ]

i know
no one's supposed to remember dying at all no matter how old they are
but we don't exactly get a choice here
there's no way to forget it unless you forget all of retrospec entirely

[fabrefactions]

Not dying specifically, but something that was unnerving to recall.

You become used to the idea, although it helps to share the memory with someone so you are not shouldering it alone. If that helps at all. Unfortunately, I do not know a way to make the process quicker.

[spirithacker]

talking about it is hard
i can try tho

this sucks a whole lot

[fabrefactions]

Death is never going to be an easy topic.

Even if you talk about it a little, it's probably better than boxing it up inside and letting it overwhelm you.

[windeity]

for what it's worth? eventually it stops being scary when you remember that you're alive right now. or at least that's how it eventually worked out for me.
but for a long time it's incredibly unnerving.
when did you remember?

[spirithacker]

today
how long is a long time

[windeity]

there are a lot of factors when it comes to that.
for me the first time i remembered one of my deaths it took me a few months.
the second death i remembered was a little easier, even though that was the more brutal one.
but i've also come to find that talking about it helped make it less scary, so there's that.

[rebellions]

[Well, that's relevant to his interests (in a morbid way).]

they say the first time's the worst
then you kind of grow used to it
more or less
come to think of it that part might be even more fucked up than the memory

pretty sure no one wants to remember that kinda shit tho

[spirithacker]

does anybody wanna remember anything
none of it seems worth this

[rebellions]

good point
too bad retrospec doesn't accept returns of shitty memories