retrospec | (no subject)

It's been a while, hasn't it? I'm afraid things are really quite busy here, and unfortunately our liaison has been compromised. Well...so have a lot of people, actually.

Are you still yourself if you're not the self you were? It's the kind of conversation we've had a lot of times, around here. I've always only been myself, but if I woke up tomorrow as someone else, would I still be me even if I wasn't?

I think rather than worrying about that the best thing I can do is focus on trying to sort things out as best I can. I'm a little worried, actually, but I think I can manage to give everyone a shot even if I can't fix things on my own or even with everyone's help.

But you can help! Or at least I think it will help if you think about what it means to be "you". It's okay if that answer changes or doesn't. Just hold onto that concept and don't let it go. And maybe tell other people what you think it means? Not like I'm saying you have to talk about that. I think usually you all just talk about anything, and I think that is also a good way to hold onto who you are and who you want to be. Sometimes I think it'd be fun, all those parties or little plans. I've never spent much time outside of these walls, did you know?

I don't have time to really ramble, though. Those of you who know what I mean, we're doing our best. Those of you who don't, you do your best too. Pay attention to the things you tell yourself, and I'll try to fix what I can fix.

Please take care.

Joanne Wiseman
Technician 2nd class
Retr

spec Incorporated

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Hm. Again, bothersome. There must be some sort of authority to which they respond.

likely, though inconclusive. they're not sharing if it is

Of course. What possible incentive would they have to identify their superiors when they play so flagrantly with the lives of their... subordinates.

got it in one
on another note
you seem aloof, mysterious, and driven. pre-med? pre-law?

I'm working towards my doctorate in history, in fact, but I appreciate that you think I'm young enough to still be pre-anything. And you?

i finished my double major in enviroscience and robotics uhh
a few years ago. give or take
it didn't particularly suit me, which i found out around the home stretch of getting my doctorate, universally known as a "bad time to figure that out"
i bet you're having a better time of it

I've heard of better times to come to that realization, yes, but I'm glad you came to the realization at all. I'm sure you're doing something better with those degrees.

There aren't many positions available for historians in this economy, and certainly not in this city. I'm sure environmentally-focused roboticists are a somewhat hotter commodity.

yeah, if i still wanted to do that at all there would be no shortage of job opportunities. this is cliche, but i didn't want to just end up a clone of my mom, you know?
this is way too personal for a stranger, sorry. long story short: i'm figuring it out. it's kind of working
back to you
history's an interesting one. what made you decide on it? what's your focus?

Military history, like my parents.

I understand your desire, of course, but my parents are some of the most important people in my life. The entire reason I'm here in this city is because of how much they encouraged me to stay on the right track and how much help they gave me along the way.

hey, i love my parents, and they are very important to me, don't get me wrong
i'd be a lot worse off if they weren't around
but everyone takes something different from their respective parents. you know? for better or worse
i'm happy your parents were able to inspire you so much. that's important

Of course. I suppose I took their interests and work ethic. If they had any worse habits, they either didn't let me see them or let my younger sister absorb them all.

Maybe this is oversharing, but it's a pleasant conversation. More pleasant than I expected from this annoying app.

i usually have nice conversations on here. you learn a lot about people in this strange little micro-society
despite the annoying pervasiveness of the app, and retrospec's continuous and vague attempts at helping

Mm. It might be useful after all as a tool to find more sources. Or connect with the skilled members of other important fields, as we are right now. Perhaps it's not completely useless.

I would be more than happy to go without the side effects of being on this app.

i was more thinking that it's nice to talk to other people who are having the shared experience of having their sense of reality constantly questioned
but your idea works too

Is that what I'm experiencing? Because I've been doing quite well treating all of this like an inconvenience that will resolve itself on its own, and I have not yet been wrong.

that's pretty self-possessed of you
seems to be getting worse rather than resolving though

Perhaps. And yet, the city is back to the way it once was. The world still turns.

I will have time to attend to the world around me when I have completed my own work.

graduate school, i know
but is that all you do? study?

My doctorate is the entire reason I ever came to this city. I cannot afford to squander my time.

so is your plan to have any amount of fun after you graduate or is it straight to the rat race for you

We'll see. I plan to move back to my hometown once I finish with graduate school if no greater opportunities arise here.

[huh.]

well, good luck with everything. retrospec and your doctorate both