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[recollecters]

Greetings, Users. Our system may be experiencing some residual glitches from a recent network malfunction. Our technical team is working on getting these issues under control. Please direct any concerns in the meantime to the HR department at humanresources@retrospec.com. Our staff has furthermore noticed a significant increase in tags and trends for #aprilfools and #pranks. Keep on your toes and be certain to tag your best tricks for Retrospec™! Please feel free to use this post as a network mingle. Every toplevel can be considered a new post, and threadjacking is permitted. No NPC response will be given. Any emails sent to the HR department will be returned with a failure to send notification, and will furthermore automatically be posted to the Retrospec network. Oops? Characters who have been in game for one month will find they can now change their profile pictures. Glitches will be in effect until the 15th and may include: -Usernames changing to a cat, dog, or bird pun. -The Retrospec application being changed into a neon color + animal theme of some variety. -Notifications going off at random and being unable to be turned off. -Various "special effects" crossing the screens when people comment. -Users having to beat a level of pac-man to access the application, and then being made to beat a new level every hour to keep using the application. -Thomas the Tank Engine memes being sent to users every hour for some reason. -Profile pictures being replaced by pictures of rabbits and easter eggs. -New creepy pasta stories appearing upon log-in, to be forwarded to someone before the app can continue to be used -Parental lock and auto-correct on cursing (i.e. fuck -> duck) -A parade of pixel Chocobos or dancing fruit scrolling across the screen after each comment posted

Comments

[tearable]

No, it's not perfect.
The Wolf was good enough. Why did they have to double pack on the wordplay?
It's trying too hard.

[ This is what she gets for yiffing. ]

Wolf. Woof. Dog puns. Absolutely but —

A lizard.

Really.

[hjack69]

maybe they didnt want to go too on the nose abt it
threw the lizard in there to keep it fresh
p sure somebody else got like
a bird pun though

frickin elizardbeth tho
make bigby get on here i want to see what his is

[tearable]

There's a thin line between being too "on the nose" or off base.

Why not "JackRussel Dawgs" for you, then?

[ Fuck this life. ]

... Okay. I'll tell him to. Just because I refuse to suffer alone.

un: bigby woof

[puffing]

I don't see what all the complaining is about.
Mine looks normal to me.

[tearable]

Oh come on! That is just unfair!

[hjack69]

im cancelling the fact that im not talking to you to talk to you bc i want you to know that name is some lazy bee ess

[hjack69]

bc jackrussel wouldnt be a pun thats just sticking another word on
now THAT would be lazy
also thx
could really use someone else who cusses a lot to share the pain

as i forgot liz said hell and didnt get censored. ~*magic*~

[tearable]

It IS a pun. Technically. It's using your name to emphasize an unrelated noun. A play on words.

What's going on with the cussing?

i'll pretend she said hecky-decky

[hjack69]

1. that pun blows 2. i have no heckin idea
ever since i turned this crap on and had to beat that level of pac man its been autocorrecting me into saying even dumber crap than usual
i mean USUALLY its dumb on purpose but now its just like
ive used the word booty abt four times today and none of them were intentional

ty just pretend she had a ned flanders seizure

[tearable]

I have to say, the unintentional booty fits you, though.

Maybe it's a shift in the Jack Dawes brand image.

[hjack69]

yeah but its gotta be in the right context or its just dumb
like bootybreath and smuckface etc those never sound good altho theyre funny ill give em that
now if it was like that one song that just goes BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY BOOTY itd be fine

what were we talking abt again

[tearable]

You have to stop day drinking.

[hjack69]

youll pry this wine bottle from my cold dead fingers darlin

[tearable]

I would, but we both know that's tequila.

[hjack69]

who says its in a tequila bottle
maybe sometimes i put stuff in the wrong bottles just to keep things interesting