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[recollecters]

Greetings, Users. Our system may be experiencing some residual glitches from a recent network malfunction. Our technical team is working on getting these issues under control. Please direct any concerns in the meantime to the HR department at humanresources@retrospec.com. Our staff has furthermore noticed a significant increase in tags and trends for #aprilfools and #pranks. Keep on your toes and be certain to tag your best tricks for Retrospec™! Please feel free to use this post as a network mingle. Every toplevel can be considered a new post, and threadjacking is permitted. No NPC response will be given. Any emails sent to the HR department will be returned with a failure to send notification, and will furthermore automatically be posted to the Retrospec network. Oops? Characters who have been in game for one month will find they can now change their profile pictures. Glitches will be in effect until the 15th and may include: -Usernames changing to a cat, dog, or bird pun. -The Retrospec application being changed into a neon color + animal theme of some variety. -Notifications going off at random and being unable to be turned off. -Various "special effects" crossing the screens when people comment. -Users having to beat a level of pac-man to access the application, and then being made to beat a new level every hour to keep using the application. -Thomas the Tank Engine memes being sent to users every hour for some reason. -Profile pictures being replaced by pictures of rabbits and easter eggs. -New creepy pasta stories appearing upon log-in, to be forwarded to someone before the app can continue to be used -Parental lock and auto-correct on cursing (i.e. fuck -> duck) -A parade of pixel Chocobos or dancing fruit scrolling across the screen after each comment posted

Comments

[hjack69]

what are you a princess or something
or a kardashian
same thing i guess

[glacian]

No, I'm merely a mild-mannered professor, that's all.

...

A Kardashian might be wealthy but they are not fit for royalty.

[hjack69]

hey same
except replace " mild mannered " w " sexyfine "
what department you teach in, teach?

[glacian]

"Sexy fine?" You must think highly of yourself.

Literature, and you? I don't believe I had the pleasure to meet you before.

[hjack69]

it aint braggin if its true
and i handle robotics
im kinda spotty on the faculty meetings and stuff you mightve been unfortunate enough to not meet me yet

[glacian]

Truth is a relative concept, isn't it?

Oh, robotics? I know of a student who expressed an interest in your course. Perhaps you'll be interested to meet him.

Now might be the time to rectify this misfortune. Do you like coffee or tea?

[hjack69]

if its that swimmer kid then i accidentally texted him a while back and hes allsb pede in it now
are you smucking serious UGH LUCK I HATE THIS SO MUCH

[ He's making a really great first impression here, no doubt. ]

i guess coffee?
dunno
im more partial to hard liquor but i can be good on a first date ;)

[ that is a goddamn winky face. ]