Retrospec, 4/7 | The images stuck in your head

[spes_phthisica]

Soujackapoo Catsuki 4/7 near Birch Hills, Recollé

okay, I wanted to ask people about something (⊃д⊂) what if one of the things you "remember" is something really bad??? I mean like... criminal bad? …φ(。。*) how do you get that out of your head? honestly I get queasy when someone draws my blood, and these memories are way worse. in relates news I guess I'd like to talk to anyone who has been getting memories of like... fighting and stuff, you know? or I guess memories of old-timey stuff too (ㆆᴗㆆ)

Comments

[vendettastool]

You don't. You just have to look for something to remind yourself that it isn't you. At least not really.

Why do you want to talk to people about memories of fighting?

[spes_phthisica]

I mean... the worst part is that in the memory, it doesn't even feel like it's a bad thing, you know?
like I'm not doing it because I'm evil it's just like any other job...

so I guess I wanted to compare to other people's memories of fighting, if they have them. see if it's similar, I guess?

[vendettastool]

Maybe for that frame of mind it was just a job. Like how you could have been remembering being a soldier or a spy or something, and it would be wrong to do somethings, you can't help but also look at it as a job, right?

That makes some sense. I just know mine doesn't.

[spes_phthisica]

i guess "soldier" would make sense...
part of the memory was training how to stab people too
I'm not sure that makes it any better though.

doesn't have fighting in it or doesn't make sense?

[vendettastool]

Yeah...
That is a little close to what I have remembered.

There's fighting in it, but I'm like only ten, so it can't be right.

[spes_phthisica]

!!!
in one of my memories i am beating up a grown man with a toy sword
and I'm maybe three or four???
and I think I'm pretty young while practicing in the other memory too
it's super weird, isn't it?

[vendettastool]

Same. Well, there's no toys. I have actual weapons, and my father is yelling that I need to focus better.

It's very weird.

[spes_phthisica]

fathers can be pretty intense about training

[Soujirou is not at all salty about his dad and him growing apart when he stopped practicing martial arts, what are you talking about?]

though not usually when real weapons are involved
did you spar with anyone?
were you in like a dojo or something?

[vendettastool]

That never factors in with Father. You can't test your limits if you don't have any repercussions from failing.

[Yoon-sung loves his father and while they disagree on several matters, he never truly hates him. He just disagrees with him from time to time.]

No. It's a jungle and Father isn't the only one there. I'm training with others even grown men.

[spes_phthisica]

sounds like something my father would say too (-_-)
but I don't think he'd encourage me to wave real weapons around...

a jungle? （￣□￣；）
and I mean if you're talented enough I guess sparring against people who are older makes sense
but it still sounds a bit messed up

[vendettastool]

Sounds like your father is probably of the same mind as mine then.
Mine doesn't. Or didn't. It's kind of confusing.

Yeah, a jungle.
I don't think that's it. I think it's more of trying to make the kid me tough fast.

[spes_phthisica]

was it your real father in the memory?
I haven't seen mom or dad or anyone that I know at all in them so it's a bit weird

also that sounds like a really, really bad idea. I mean, from a child psychology standpoint it's really just dumb.

[Look, he can't help it, he's drowning in child psychology textbooks right now.]

[vendettastool]

Yes

Who knows? That's just what I was remembering.