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Hey, Users! This month's wikihow is right over here. In other news, don't you just love our logo colors? Such a nice shade of blue. I'm pretty fond of it myself! You know, Janet has blue eyes. But then, I guess you guys don't know anyone with eyes that color anymore, right? Whoops.

Anyway, see you next month! Well, some of you anyway. :)

Jim Halloway
Research & Development
Retr

spec Incorporated

As discussed on the monthly plot post the colors blue and green are now gray - except for the blue on the retrospec application logo and their building sign, although no NPC will be capable of seeing the color in these places. As stated in the plot post, NPCs will also seem to be completely unaware that the colors blue and green ever existed. Oops.

Please feel free to use this post as a network mingle. Every toplevel can be considered a new post, and threadjacking is permitted. No NPC response will be given. Usernames are the character's full real AU names, not aliases or chosen nicknames or usernames, and seemed to have filled themselves in; nothing characters do can change or obscure their names currently. Last's month's application round characters are now capable of changing their profile pictures.

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Ardyn Izunia He would have mentioned it to me at some point, I think. Or I would have heard about this on the news.

[Another minute.]

Ardyn Izunia The internet fails to produce any articles about it, either.
Ardyn Izunia And it's strange, don't you think? That Retrospec would focus on something that's already happened in "this" world?

[togusa r u sure]

[There is a very. Long. Pause. Before Togusa gets back to Ardyn. Because what?]

Hitori Togusa No. No, I'm sure of it. I even remember one of the cases we were working together. This kidnapping case of some CEO.
Hitori Togusa Lot of good we were, he turned up just fine a few days later.
Hitori Togusa The video, and even that crack, it's like Retrospec is trying to make me think it was my fault. It said he was on his way to see me when he died. And I just can't remember it properly.

Ardyn Izunia That doesn't make sense. Why would you be the only outlier?
Ardyn Izunia That Retrospec should make you focus on a present day experience rather than an inexplicable memory?

[He's going to be kind enough to allow Togusa to connect the dots.]

Ardyn Izunia Look it up for yourself, if you don't believe me.

Hitori Togusa Those videos from before, I'm not the only one that was focused on something recent.
Hitori Togusa That was how the entire mess between Dante and Sergeant Furugawa got kicked off in the first place.

Hitori Togusa But all right. Lemme go find the report, if it's that important to you.

[There is not a response from Togusa for a very very long time.]

[That isn't the same, he wants to type, but-- All right. Togusa is going to do a bit of digging, and Ardyn will wait.

And wait.

And wait.]

Ardyn Izunia Well?

Hitori Togusa Give me time. I can't find it yet. I know I was out of my mind when it happened, but I've just got to be looking in the wrong dates. Why can't I remember more of the details?

Hitori Togusa I remember being at his damn grave. This happened, why can't I find the specifics?

[Anger is bubbling up faster than his worry. Hard to say which side it'll fall on, at the moment, though.]

[Sooooo Ardyn is just going to write what he's thinking.]

Ardyn Izunia I think it's time that you reconsider the validity of this particular memory. Or at least, in how it applies to /this/ reality.

Hitori Togusa But I didn't get this in some kind of a flash, like the Tachikomas. This is real, I already knew about Yamaguchi!
Hitori Togusa This isn't the crap Retrospec is trying to get us to believe, he was a real person and he died and it was important and I can't remember why!

Ardyn Izunia Then why can't you find any evidence of it? It shouldn't be so difficult, should it? A quick Google search shouldn't fail you, much less any other resources at your disposal.

Hitori Togusa You're pulling that teacher line again. Trying to get me to tell myself the conclusion that you've come to.
Hitori Togusa If this isn't real, then how much of the rest of my career isn't real, hmm? That's where we're going?
Hitori Togusa You're wrong and I'm going to prove you wrong on this one.

[The teacher line is a very old habit of his, sorry Togusa. But he feels 90 percent correct on this one. (He feels a bit bad, though, because the last thing he wants to do is create an existential crisis for him.)

But at the same time, floundering in ignorance isn't much better.]

Ardyn Izunia That's not at all where I'm going. All I'm saying is that if you can't find proof of this one memory existing here, and Retrospec has been known to focus on it prior, then it likely isn't anything that happened in this lifetime.
Ardyn Izunia Your fellow officers would know better than I, though.
Ardyn Izunia Check with them.

[It isn't until the next morning that Ardyn gets a response. Guess who stayed up looking through records all night?]

Hitori Togusa Look for an answer, just get another question.
Hitori Togusa Gabranth is damn sure that this didn't happen in Recolle.

Hitori Togusa But it got me to a name. The Laughing Man. Mean anything to you?

[He wasn't sure when he'd hear back from Togusa, and so when he does, his curiosity (and concern) spikes once more. The response is a prompt one.]

Ardyn Izunia I thought he might tell you that.
Ardyn Izunia And no, not that I can think of at the moment.
Ardyn Izunia How is this Laughing Man connected to all of this?

Hitori Togusa It has to do with the case we were working.
Hitori Togusa Or maybe that I was helping him with. It's less clear now.
Hitori Togusa I remembered that Retrospec was right, I was the last person Yamaguchi talked to. He was on his way to see me when he died. But this might not have taken place here. In the place with the tanks.

Hitori Togusa The Laughing Man. He'd been involved in the kidnapping of a CEO, Ernest Serano. Another name that comes up blank on any search.

Hitori Togusa But now I can't see what any of this means anymore.

Ardyn Izunia It means the same as it does for the rest of us: your narrative still remains incomplete.

[But more importantly:]

Ardyn Izunia Are you all right?

Hitori Togusa But is it really my narrative? Is everyone just so willing to accept this?
Hitori Togusa I keep urging people not to lose track of themselves, in the memories of someone else that you are seeing. Telling Dante and Cleo and Chloe, don't give in to this idea of being a fighter and going up against monsters.

Hitori Togusa So do I give in to that, myself?

Ardyn Izunia Who else's would it be? Does it not /feel/ like yours?

[Which is, admittedly, not a fair question. But he doesn't know how else to word it -- all of his memories felt very much "his".]

Ardyn Izunia And that's for yourself to decide, isn't it?
Ardyn Izunia Why not take your own advice?

Hitori Togusa The idea that I'd worked in this city with Yamaguchi felt real. But now, so does this.
Hitori Togusa But if he wasn't from here, if I'm relying on Retrospec for my information? I cant just chase down the truth of the memory. Maybe if it didn't involve somebody else, I'd be better able to ignore it.

Ardyn Izunia I haven't met anyone with the strength of will to ignore these memories completely. If you can manage that at all, Togusa, I would applaud you.
Ardyn Izunia The truth of the matter is, these memories are too compelling to ignore.
Ardyn Izunia Even if our curiosity leads to changes in ourselves that we don't want, we're drawn to them regardless.
Ardyn Izunia And in that, our reliance on Retrospec feels resolute.

Hitori Togusa I. Thank you. I don't know if I can hack it, but I'll try.

Hitori Togusa Are you sure about that, though, haven't met anyone? Even looking in a mirror? The thought of magic, being able to heal the sick, it's too appealing? Or just too interesting to ignore?

Ardyn Izunia "Interesting" isn't quite the right word, but you have the right idea.
Ardyn Izunia If these memories truly were from another me, then there's a large part of my very being that I'm not aware of.
Ardyn Izunia Perhaps it's true that I could live happily in ignorance from here on out, but the holes that remain unfilled taunt me from afar.

Ardyn Izunia Would you prefer to be oblivious, Togusa?

Hitori Togusa But it's not to do with you. That's my point. These aren't us.
Hitori Togusa I'd rather learn the truth of it. But I'd really rather that these things Retrospec is showing everyone weren't so painful. People can prepare for the probable things that are hurtful. Why are there teenagers with soldier training? Kids who know that they've fought monsters?
Hitori Togusa If you're right, and there's truth to what they're seeing? Then my larger cosmic question becomes Why the hell do times and places exist where these things are true?

[And his question in return is simple enough.]

Ardyn Izunia How do you know that the lives that we're seeing don't belong to us?

[OH, is Togusa cross about that question, but he will genuinely think about it before just blurting out his answer.]

Hitori Togusa The idea of the karma and spiritual energy of a previous life was never supposed to be taken so literally.
Hitori Togusa If you know what you've done in a previous life, maybe it would better inform how to improve in this life, but it's also too easy to start carrying the burdens and guilt of what was done in those lives. That's why we aren't supposed to know.

Hitori Togusa The magic that we're seeing, it's becoming a fact. Slowly, but it's there. Maybe these impossible worlds are true, then, too?

Ardyn Izunia I suppose it's impossible to say with any real certainty.
Ardyn Izunia All I know is that I've seen the impossible happen several times ever since Retrospec became a constant in our lives.
Ardyn Izunia Therefore, I'm keeping my mind open to all manner of possibilities.

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