01 | the answers agency presents...

[elevelvetor]

Elizabeth Velveteen and Goro Akechi of the newly-formed The Answers Agency would like to announce that, after multiple days of investigation, we have found that a member of Retrospec's userbase is actually an incredibly kind person.

Silver Bells, known on the app as Gintaro Suzukaze, has done wonderful things such as:

* sprayed water on people on a very hot day
* helped newcomers adjust to retrospec
* had his nails painted a bright assortment of colors that was sure to clash with his hair to help out with someone’s bingo square
* promo’d his brother for bingo and because he obviously loves him
* rescues cats from trees on a biweekly basis
* befriends friendless losers
* lends his aid without asking for anything in return

(citation for at least two of these)

We thank you for reading and ask that you spread the good word about Silver, and perhaps share stories of your own of his kindness!

also, i (The Answers Agency president, Elizabeth) will be holding a show everyone is free to come to in Recollé Square on the 15th, at 5pm. you’ll have to bring your own snacks, but other refreshments will be provided.
additionally, those with a serious interest in becoming a detective or making their way in the investigative world should contact either myself or Akechi for more information about The Answers Agency!
we will also take cases, big or small, missing pets or stolen items, so feel free to contact about that as well.

[ ooc: replies will come from both Elizabeth and Goro (twostringsonebow)! ...and Silver, probably, damage control at its finest. ]

Comments

[feistytrader]

Shuji, I know where you work. I will knock over everything in your damn store and argue with you for thirty minutes about how I don't need an ID to buy booze because I'm obviously over twenty-one. Don't tempt me.

[twostringsonebow]

Your threats are getting more harmful, Silver. You'd best be careful no one takes them seriously.

[elevelvetor]

like a detective sworn to uphold justice?

[twostringsonebow]

Indeed. I won't allow harm to come to any person or establishment.

[elevelvetor]

what a bold declaration.
are you certain you can uphold such lofty standards as you are now?

[twostringsonebow]

[he doesn't know if she means his fragile emotional stability or his "can't throw a punch" nature but]

I'll exceed them, Miss Velveteen. It's what I always aim to do.

[elevelvetor]

[ both, goro. ]

i wish you the best of luck.

[ her face reads "you're gonna need it, buddy" ]

[feistytrader]

What are you gonna do, delicately punch my shoulder?

[twostringsonebow]

Have you ever heard of "criminal threats", Silver?

[feistytrader]

You realize most people can't see any of the shit we say on retrospec, right?

[thesettingsun]

I didn't say she was right! About any of that!

[feistytrader]

Good. It better stay that way.

[thesettingsun]

Also, store policy is to card people until you can see wrinkles. Do you want to be wrinkly, Silver. Do you.

[feistytrader]

It's not about the booze, it's about being a massive inconvenience.

[thesettingsun]

You can't be worse than a lot of our customers.

[feistytrader]

You really need a new job, buddy.

[thesettingsun]

If I quit my parents will kill me.

[feistytrader]

Go look for a new one before you quit. Maybe you'll find something less shitty and retail.

[thesettingsun]

With no degree?

[feistytrader]

How long have you been at your job again? Maybe the work experience will help.

[thesettingsun]

About two years. You're right, but I don't want to be too optimistic.

[feistytrader]

Two years is a lot. Don't quit your job off the bat, but it's not a bad idea to look around, either.

we're both boomeranging this to distract ourselves from the tf investigation, aren't we

[thesettingsun]

What even is there in my field? Sometimes I don't know why I picked this major.

i know i'm watching it for that purpose

[twostringsonebow]

What major is it?

easier to focus on one thing than like 30 while refreshing yes

[feistytrader]

Write a book about a teenager falling in love with a vampire.