retrospec | (no subject)

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(no subject)

Don't bother the techs.

Seriously, don't. I'm not entirely sure what's going on but all I'm getting is that it's the equivalent of being hacked and someone who knows layer theory better than we do is out there screwing things up and tampering with the project.

I don't have a really good update for you guys, but bear with us. Please?

Zee Carlisle
Hiring Manager
Retr

spec Incorporated

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i'm not in a simulation or a computer!!!!!
i pinched myself just to make sure
i'm totally a real person!!!

but if we can be reprogrammed, i wouldn't say no to finally getting those superpowers i wanted...

that's just what they want you to think!! they totally installed a 'pinch' program into your brain just for this

and yeah superpowers for everyone!!! you get a power you get a power and everyone gets to pick what they want

i want everything

no fair!!!!
i want everything too!!

...except for maybe growing super big and fat
that's a weird power
i'm okay without that one

what????
why would you even think of that
that's not a superpower
that's just

obesity

but there's superheroes who do it!!!
you know the ones who get all angry and then explode to like ten times their size
it's a thing!!

dude
get better comic books
there's like
so many better superpowers out there

i don't own any comic books!!!
i'm not a geek
i just know because it's in cartoons and stuff too

and that was my point anyway!!!
i want the cool superpowers, not the lame ones

wow rude
comic books are totally valid forms of entertainment for cool peeps too
i'd know cause i'm a cool peep

what would you want

i'm pretty sure that saying the words "cool peep" automatically makes you not cool!!!

and that's a good question...
i think i'd want to have something like shooting lightning from my hands or something so i can fight off baddies!!
but maybe also like a forcefield or something so i can stay safe

you're just too old!! cool peeps is the new thing now it's totally a thing

you can just make a forcefield with your lightning duh
like electromagnetwhatever

i'm not even 18 yet!!!!!
i still have over a month left of 17
so i'm not old!!!

and does lightning really work like that???
i never thought about it...

if you started reading comic books you'd know that it totally works like that

you just gotta learn how to do it

then i guess i've got to get the powers first, so i can practice!!!

but i'd still rather have more powers if i can
probably safer that way

that's the spirit
you can accomplish anything if you're greedy enough

why lightning though? you can totally shoot all kinds a' stuff like

instant death beams

i wouldn't want to actually kill anybody!!!
that'd be terrible!!!!!!
i'd just want to stun them if they were trying to hurt me or something

oh
ok what if you can like
modify the strength of your death ray between levels

so there's 'burnt toast' and then 'bone disintegration'

burnt toast still sounds really bad when you're talking about people...
why does it need to be a death ray at all???
why not a stun gun instead??

a little suntan never hurt anyone

...ok so sometimes you get skin cancer and die but like

on a short term scale

i guess you can have a stun gun but what if you really need to take out a bad guy

do stun guns not work on bad guys?????
i think it'd stun them just as much...
and then you tie them up and throw them in the jail!!!

the big ones always keep going through the tase
you'd know that if you watched the right shows

you have to stun 'em like, six times before they go down

then... what if i also had a freeze ray???
then i could freeze them and hit them six times before they could move again!!!
and i wouldn't have to kill anyone

what if they're a supervillain that has heat rays or heat breath or heat aura
then you're screwed

then i hit them with the freeze ray before they can use their heath breath!!!
duh

no no it's like in pocket creatures
if you use flame wheel when you're frozen you unfreeze see

same deal

but i don't think you can use it if you're frozen???
that doesn't make any sense

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