retrospec | (no subject)

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It's been a while, hasn't it? I'm afraid things are really quite busy here, and unfortunately our liaison has been compromised. Well...so have a lot of people, actually.

Are you still yourself if you're not the self you were? It's the kind of conversation we've had a lot of times, around here. I've always only been myself, but if I woke up tomorrow as someone else, would I still be me even if I wasn't?

I think rather than worrying about that the best thing I can do is focus on trying to sort things out as best I can. I'm a little worried, actually, but I think I can manage to give everyone a shot even if I can't fix things on my own or even with everyone's help.

But you can help! Or at least I think it will help if you think about what it means to be "you". It's okay if that answer changes or doesn't. Just hold onto that concept and don't let it go. And maybe tell other people what you think it means? Not like I'm saying you have to talk about that. I think usually you all just talk about anything, and I think that is also a good way to hold onto who you are and who you want to be. Sometimes I think it'd be fun, all those parties or little plans. I've never spent much time outside of these walls, did you know?

I don't have time to really ramble, though. Those of you who know what I mean, we're doing our best. Those of you who don't, you do your best too. Pay attention to the things you tell yourself, and I'll try to fix what I can fix.

Please take care.

Joanne Wiseman
Technician 2nd class
Retr

spec Incorporated

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people who've spent so long with silver spoons in their mouths that they complain about the metal taste in all their food

i think that makes sense but i'm not sure, you know what i mean

I understand what you mean.

You believe that your troubles are far bigger than theirs, too, then?

do i think having to choose between food and rent is a bigger problem than having to choose between which fancy new toy i want to play with for five minutes and then ignore for weeks?

[ He's starting to think she doesn't actually have this covered. Huh. ]

Do you think those are the only problems that people with silver spoons have? Have you blinded yourself so completely by your miserable situation that you cannot sympathize with anyone outside it?

if you're trying to get me to feel sympathetic towards people with more money than they know what to do with then you should stop trying

Money does make living easier, but it doesn't make our lives easier.

You will never find anyone to understand and sympathize with you if you cannot understand that much. In the end, with your current attitude, you'll find more people wishing for you to suffer than to want to help you up.

okay, then what challenges do people with your kind of money face?

i'm listening, really, i am

[ Hm, he wonders. But well, she did ask. ]

They have no dreams or hopes of their own.

The money that they have comes at a price: their futures. They cannot dream for anything beyond what that money wants them to dream. They cannot hope for anything beyond what that money wants them to hope. If they do, they are selfish. If they do, they are ungrateful. If they do, they are worthless to the family and to society.

There are no dreams they can chase or seek. They are just inheriting a will and nothing else.

if i had money, i would be able to put myself through college, i would be able to move somewhere on my own and stock my kitchen with more than just... vodka and steakums, i would be able to be HAPPY

i don't understand. but neither will you, ever, if that's all you think money is

I'm merely speaking of some problems of those with silver spoons.

The money that you seek is different money. It's money where you can hope for a dream and a future for yourself. Is money where you do not inherit the will of someone else to hold it. You should seek out a better future for yourself. There are those on this app that have much better jobs and may be willing to help you find that happiness you want.

But you have to recognize the suffering and pain of others, or you will not be able to find that happiness.

i don't know what you're talking about

money is money

Not at all.

The money of the poor is money that feeds dreams that they cannot yet, if ever, be held in their hands. The money of the rich comes at the price of dreams and freedom.

Everything comes with a price and we attempt to view it as a compromise.

i find that really, really hard to believe but i'm sure it makes sense to you and that's the important part

all i know is that the money of the rich would solve every problem every poor person has, ever.

I suppose I am being quite general, but well, at least you're willing to admit that me understanding my own point is important, haha. [ Isn't he cheeky? ]

Anyway, you are correct. The money of the rich would solve the problem of the poor, but it would come at a price. I'm uncertain if it is a price that you would want to pay, and if you do, you would have already paid it. That said, perhaps, I should try to solve some of your problems. For once you are off the razor's edge, you might be able to see things a little clearer.

what's the catch

The catch is that you'll have to befriend one of those people that you hate. Truly befriend them. And I'll do what I can to ease some of your problems. Sound fair?

is it that easy to make real friends?

besides, i wasn't talking about you specifically

Not at all.
But neither will be helping you out with your problems.
So it's a fair deal.

But since you weren't talking about me specifically. I can tell you the price. The price most likely would be your pride.

how is giving a poor person money not the easiest thing in the w

no you know what i don't want the answer to that because you've probably already explained it enough and it just went over my head

bold of you to assume i haven't been hungry enough to swallow it before

Edited 2018-07-04 06:47 (UTC)

Haha. You're catching on to my prattling ways, I'm pleased.

I suppose it is bold of me, but then, does that not speak well for you? It means that you still have your pride and dignity that a stranger believes you've never had to compromise it before.

maybe you just need to change your mental image of what a poor person looks and talks and acts like

Perhaps!

But I'm giving you a compliment so I won't take back what I said.

i wasn't asking you to

i just wish people who have money didn't apparently think we were all so broken and in despair all the time

i'm poor AND i'm depressed thanks they're two separate things

I am sorry that you have to deal with that, too.
It certainly makes it harder.
But you've yet to be broken under it all.
So congratulations, your spirit still shines bright.

is that how it works

it's flickering really low lately but that's not a surprise to you by now i guess