(no subject)

[admiringly]

[ Alpha#03012858 ]

hi!!
i'm still getting used to this phone
(i really miss my actual phone it has to to super dead by now don't you think?)
i wanted to invite all of you to talk about the people who used to be on the app but aren't anymore
i feel like the more i think about the people i miss the less they seem to be missing
does that make sense?

it may be a little sad but i think talking about them will help
what do you love about the people you miss?
what do you wish you could tell them?
what was one of your favorite things you did with them?
is there a habit they had that you picked up?
who do you wish would get retrospec back
who are you glad doesn't have retrospec anymore
anything really!

let's talk about everyone so they don't disappear into this
whatever this digital world? video game world? we're in

Comments

ALPHA#07011227

[invocate]

i really miss noah. we didn't meet until after i got the app, so he doesn't remember me anymore.

is it selfish of me to want him to get the app back? probably. but i want him to come back. i want to believe that he will.

past-me once told someone that when she loses someone in her life, it's like a piece of her world disappears. i feel like i understand that now.

every time one of my friends goes off the app, my world feels a little smaller.

[admiringly]

i don't think it's wrong to want to get a friend back
it's not often people off the app can know of the retrospec world
but i think if you believe they'll come back
if you have hope
you can keep your world open
and it can grow bigger again

[heiroglyphs]

Victoria Nichols and Dante Rantanen.
The two of them mean the world to me.
They taught me that I don't have to be alone in this world, and I should never be embarrassed about being myself.
I love them both with all my heart.
And neither of them remember a thing about me anymore.

[admiringly]

they sound wonderful!
i hope someday soon they get the chance to remember you again
because people who can make you feel like that and make you realize that about yourself are people you should be able to stay connected with

[me_matey]

majima. 100%

it just aint right without that dude around ya feel me? mostly i still need him to teach me to play mahjong.

[admiringly]

majima!!
i talked to him once
he likes baseball and fighting
would he not teach you even if he doesn't have retrospec?

[thesettingsun]

[Long comments are difficult on this phone.

Shuji mentions everyone he can think of.]

Mista had me watch Pretty Woman once and then we talked about it afterwards, very seriously, for two hours straight.

John and I once traded stupid pickup-lines with the worst puns you can think of.

Odasaku never really believed me that he wasn't a bother to the people he cared about. If there's anyone I would like to bring happiness to, it's him.

Koutarou, for a long time, was the only other person whose past life and mine came from the same place, and in a way that was a reassurance to me. Someone else went through the same changes I did, and we could commiserate.

Atsushi is the most goddamn adorable tiger you have seen in your life.

Heigo and I are similar people, in a lot of ways. He offered to listen to my problems even when he'd just gotten the app and hadn't had the chance to get adjusted to most of it, and I was grateful.

Fai was my therapist, and being able to talk to a professional helped a ton. His cookies were delicious, that helped too.

I called Majima Dad accidentally once and he never let me forget it. Over time it stopped being accidental on my part.

Chuuya let me name a drink after my first novel.

Once Tuuri and I had a conversation about how on a map of Northern Europe, it looks like a dick split in half with Finland being the balls. She thought that was hilarious.

Ryoji was never a monster to me even once, and he should know that.

Silver was the first person I came to after a traumatizing memory. He rushed right over even though I told him he didn't have to.

Even when Zoro and I were only on lukewarm terms, he still demolished a TV in the subway car rather than see a memory I didn't want to be shown.

Even when Baren and I were on bad terms, he probably saved my life.

I dogsat for Mohammed once, in the August with the monsters. Iggy's really not that bad when you get to know him.

Grell has fantastic taste in books and clothes.

Minako and I cosplayed together, and even if that con ended super badly it helped me get my confidence up.

Anya and I got stuck to each other for Valentine's Day and she was really sympathetic about me not being able to go spend the day with my boyfriend with a teenage girl literally attached to me. We ended up watching a movie instead of my other idea, pretending to be in a coma.

I threatened Ann once that if she got hurt on a mission, I'd buy her the most expensive thing on a cafe menu. This apparently worked somehow?

Yato had his own shrine set up in the Inkwell, and I remember coming to work and seeing it and not being able to pass by without at least giving it a nod, if not an actual offering.

Fawkes and I wrote poetry complaining about the time Jim wanted us to write an ode to his girlfriend. Now wife, I guess.

There are more, I know there are more, but trying to think of all of them makes my head hurt a little.

[admiringly]

oh my gosh this is so many people
i'm sorry you've lost so many people
but it's also great that you love and remember so many
it's really heartwarming

ryoji could never be a monster
even death couldn't make him one
even death couldn't make me stop loving him
all he wants to do is embrace the world

minako is really great at that isn't she?
helping to support people and give them confidence
she's so bright and strong and cares so much for people
if i could be a little more like her that way
i'd be happy

i'm glad anya convinced you to watch movies instead!
i think pretending to be in a coma would've alarmed your boyfriend more
anya's really sweet and understanding
she's someone who tries hard and pursues what she wants
she reaches for her dreams and catches stars

yato!!
i don't know if he should be worshiped
but he absolutely deserves to be remembered and acknowledged
his personality is larger than life
and he always tried to come through for the people he loved
i think he'd try to move the heavens if he could

Beta#1201563

[akatatai]

I mean, you already know my answer
But talking about it with you last month really did make me feel better, so I think this is a great idea

Aside from Mao though, it's my family for sure
Hinata and Rise and Chiaki, though they were all on Retrospec for different amounts of time
It didn't feel that weird when they lost access since things just went back to the way they always were
I could still see them every day and it felt almost the same, except there were things I couldn't talk about anymore

But when we're separated from everyone, the divide between those of us with Retrospec starts to sink in
And it starts feeling lonely again

[admiringly]

i really miss hinata and rise too
i miss talking to them without a filter
without having to catch myself
all your cousins sparkle with life

i don't know how to make it happen
but i want that divide to be torn down someday
so that even if they don't have retrospec
we can still talk to them about it

BETA#053118937

[clothes]

There is no one in particular I miss that much. I'm fortunate in that most of the people I've become close to return within a month or so if it appears their app has disappeared. They usually come to their senses quickly, though I suppose it's debatable whether that's a good thing or not.

The person I miss *least*, however, is an easy one. Atsushi Nakajima. I can't express how glad I am I never have to see that pathetic face of his again. Going to his bakery every day was an exercise in patience. If I never see him again, it would still be too soon.

[ ok, helga pataki, calm down ]

[admiringly]

that's lucky for you!
lucky in the way that you don't have to miss them
if your or their memories are on the more terrible side then i'm sorry but it's good that you're still surrounded by people who will know what you're going through

oh no
was this atsushi rude to you?
is it the atsushi that shuji says is a cute tiger?

[ does akutagawa have a secret closet shrine to go with this declaration ]

[pronounces]

it'd have to be one of my old residents, mikachin
he was only on the app for a month or so, but... it was nice to have something to bond over. i always thought he didn't like me that much, but we got really close when he came onto retrospec.
and then, i found out he was really close to me in the other life, too
i've had a lot of memories of him since he left the app.
i'm kind of glad it protects him from all of these horrible things, but...
it'd be nice to share things like the music from the other life with him, you know?

[admiringly]

it's good that you found out he doesn't hate you!!

do you still talk to him now?
or is it harder because he doesn't have retrospec anymore?
it might not be the same but he could still enjoy the music
even if he doesn't know where it's from

beta#1101575

[cardcaptured]

... Sakura. Sakura Kinomoto.

We knew one another from school before either of us got Retrospec, so it's not like she's forgotten me, but

Not having someone to talk to who shares the same memories as you is... difficult. I'm happier she's off the app, so she doesn't have to worry about this anymore, or be in any danger, but... hiding this sort of thing from someone you're close to and not being able to explain it is hard, too.

But I'd rather have her here than have her missing entirely.

[admiringly]

is she the girl you like?

but i understand 100%
i feel that way about all the people i knew who used to be one the app
even if there's some kind of invisible divide between us i still want to be able to see them all and talk to them one way or another

Beta#1101171543

[floret]

Oh my gosh I never thought about that
Our phones dying, I mean
I kind of figured that if we die in our phones, we die in real life
But what if that also means, if our phones die in real life, we die, too?

[admiringly]

no!!!
we'd all be dead then
and i don't want that to be true
we're probably separate from our phones in that way

alpha#07012219

[twostringsonebow]

I'm afraid that every time I list out the people who're gone now that I knew gets longer and longer...
Though perhaps that's simply something that happens after being on this app for so long. Like having all of your friends in school and suddenly losing that connection.
Well, no matter. There's a few I miss dearly, though I've become used to that divide; it's still difficult to live someplace alone though, I've found. Their pets are still here, but they aren't...
I've said my pieces to them before, and I'm rather glad they don't have to deal with the things I do now, but
it'd be nice, I suppose, if I could vent with them again.

Anyway.
Everyone that's blessedly left this app has been someone dear to my heart for some reason or another; they were all people I felt I could confess to, or be more of myself around, and it's... hard to make that sort of connection again. I'm thankful for the few I have left, and I'm able to interact with others my own age more easily than this time last year, but it's not the same.
Selfishly, I
am glad that there are certain people gone now.
We... didn't have the best of relations in the memories we shared, or rather we hadn't any at all, and the person who I was then did inexcusable things to them; though I'd face it should they return, I'm grateful for the chance to continue to play pretend and act like everything's normal between us.
Even if it's like that.
But I digress; despite naming names as the others have done, this has helped my mood. ♪
Thank you for the opportunity.

[admiringly]

all i wanted out of this was for a way to make people feel better!
if only by just a little
it can be sad to talk about people like this but i think it helps to release your sadness even if it's more out in the open
i've been trying to be better about that for myself

but i agree!
that it's good for some people to not deal with the changes that retrospec will make them go through even if it does get lonely
but because you still remember those people and how they helped you be more you
they will always stay with you even through that divide

if it gives you peace of mind to play pretend that's good
but
no...never mind it's not my place to ask that question
um
did you know elizabeth said i could ask you to talk about your boyfriend and you'd be happy to talk to me about him?

[ he may not have named any names, but chiyo is. ]

alpha#05011856

[thisloveisjustice]

a lot of people
but mostly some of my family
theyre still in recolle so i still see them
but im glad theyre not on the app anymore
it made one of them really unhappy

[admiringly]

me too
even if i miss them so so much even when i see them
how much of your family ended up on the app?

Beta#09015591

[windeity]

not a bad idea.
there are three different girls that i think i miss the most off of everybody that used to be on the app, and all for three different reasons.
yukiko was one of the first friends i ever made when i moved to the city. she was powerful and used the tools retrospec gave her to really be kind of a badass? plus she was always really funny. we have the same sense of humor and i always appreciated that.
ayano was a weird kind of friendship in the way of, like, something way too intense to be real but having a lot of good conversations that forced you to grow up. in the end i think our friendship was maybe fading a little but i still hope she's happy. she and her girlfriend are both off of the network now as far as i understand.
and natalie was probably the closest thing i had to a sister even if i'm pretty sure all of my memories i ever shared with her freaked her out. she had a lot of baggage to unpack as she remembered stuff, but she put up with my bullshit and freaking out about my identity and sexuality crisis like a champ.
there was also rose, too. we didn't talk as much as i wanted when she was on the app but i have way too many memories of her from my old life that it's worth mentioning anyway.
it'd suck if they all disappeared. i don't want that to happen.
also i miss my actual phone too, all of my music was on there and i am kind of pissed i do not have access to it.

[admiringly]

gasp john that's four not three?
how could you lie to me
hehe they all sound like wonderful people and i'm so glad they've been able to touch your life!
yukiko sounds like a role model and natalie helped you through so much
ayano really is intense isn't she? she felt so much so fast and sometimes it was hard to keep up but that's what made her uniquely her!

we're going to our phones back
and we're going to get our friends back
and then you're going to share with me any new music you've made!!
right?

alpha#03015671

[commandertoolbelt]

dante's a huge jerk but he's kind of like the brother i never had

minako's one of the most supportive people i've ever met

cleo was a good friend, and kind of terrifying in a fight but she's the one i'd always want on my side

sora's probably going to end up with a zoo in his garage if no one can talk him out of it

as much as trouble as retrospec gives us, i wish they were still along for the ride with the rest of us
it's not like they're gone forever but it's weird seeing all this stuff without them you know?
i'm going to miss all of them

[admiringly]

yeah i feel the same way
sometimes it's easier to go through stuff together with people you already have strong connections with
some things can be left unsaid

[matchbreaker]

[ Alpha#05011622 ]

I'd say it makes sense. It's a sweet sentiment, honestly.

My boys come to mind first for me, of course. I'm not even sure if I want them back on the app or to remain on it. I suppose the selfish part of me wants them on, even if that in and of itself's a weird thing to swallow.

[admiringly]

i don't think it's selfish to want to be with your family
if it is then i'm selfish too