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[recollecters]

Greetings, Users. Our system may be experiencing some residual glitches from a recent network malfunction. Our technical team is working on getting these issues under control. Please direct any concerns in the meantime to the HR department at humanresources@retrospec.com. Our staff has furthermore noticed a significant increase in tags and trends for #aprilfools and #pranks. Keep on your toes and be certain to tag your best tricks for Retrospec™! Please feel free to use this post as a network mingle. Every toplevel can be considered a new post, and threadjacking is permitted. No NPC response will be given. Any emails sent to the HR department will be returned with a failure to send notification, and will furthermore automatically be posted to the Retrospec network. Oops? Characters who have been in game for one month will find they can now change their profile pictures. Glitches will be in effect until the 15th and may include: -Usernames changing to a cat, dog, or bird pun. -The Retrospec application being changed into a neon color + animal theme of some variety. -Notifications going off at random and being unable to be turned off. -Various "special effects" crossing the screens when people comment. -Users having to beat a level of pac-man to access the application, and then being made to beat a new level every hour to keep using the application. -Thomas the Tank Engine memes being sent to users every hour for some reason. -Profile pictures being replaced by pictures of rabbits and easter eggs. -New creepy pasta stories appearing upon log-in, to be forwarded to someone before the app can continue to be used -Parental lock and auto-correct on cursing (i.e. fuck -> duck) -A parade of pixel Chocobos or dancing fruit scrolling across the screen after each comment posted

Comments

[notbunaga]

hopefully it gets fixed
i dont want anyone calling me pawki irl or i may have to kill them

[appraiser]

that's pretty extreme!
you don't like it? i think it's cute
and inclusive
like an inside joke between Retrospec users

[notbunaga]

im not here to make friends i can share injokes with

[#edge

never mind the fact retrospec has made her some already though...]

this is more like we're all stuck together
and i dont need dumb names making it more irritating than it already is

[appraiser]

everyone being stuck with something together is a great basis for friendship
working together towards a common goal and all that

so
if not friends
why *are* you here?

[notbunaga]

because i want to know who's affected by this
what they're experiencing
and any information that might have
even if i dont reply to most of the stuff on this Silly app i read everything
doesnt matter how inane it is
you never know what you might pick up

[appraiser]

absolutely everything?
that's right... the messages aren't exactly locked, are they?
i just assumed my words would be lost in the sea of background chatter

[ uh. time to be more conscientious about who he talks to and about what, i guess ]

still, you're diligent!
learned anything fun so far?

[notbunaga]

maybe

[she actually means no

it's literally all just the same social media stuff you'd see on facebook...the only thing that qualifies as interesting to her is actual retrospec information, which is few and far between.]

i wouldnt just give it away, though...
information brokers would be out of a job if they just freely shared everything, you know?
so i'm taking a page from their book

[appraiser]

[ aren't we in this together? why ]

are you charging for the information?
i could pay
and make it open access
it'd help everybody if information is freely shared and discussed, you too

[notbunaga]

[...]

peas and rice
oh truck off that's a stupid censor

look
there's literally nothing important here
it's all the same social media stuff youd find anywhere else
"here's what i did today" or "ooh i drew this rate it" or "check out these animals"
youd be paying me for literally nothing
i dont know why you expected anything else

[although if she were a shadier sort she could've just had him pay for all that meaningless info]

[appraiser]

lol i was about to ask if you were hungry
maybe you can think about having dinner with me?

everything's important
you can learn a lot about people from what they post, and if you could distill things down and organize it, it's even better
this person can draw, so i'd know to go to them to appreciate art
that person likes animals, so i'd know to talk to them about animals and get to know them better
that sort of information

[notbunaga]

oh
i get it
we just have different priorities
im literally just trying to find information on important stuff
like all the weird stuff that's been happening lately
that's all

you're like
way more feelsy than i am i guess

[appraiser]

both can be important!
i'm not sure what feelsy means though, unless that's another censorship

also what about dinner?

[notbunaga]

oh you were serious

then no

[appraiser]

if i weren't serious, would that have been a yes?

[notbunaga]

when i thought you werent serious i just ignored what you said
so what do you think

[appraiser]

of course i'm serious
it's about getting to know you, and spending time with you, and learning about what sorts of food you like

[notbunaga]

what
why?

[She gets this from Anya but that's Anya.

She can't imagine anyone else being like her.]

[appraiser]

why?
because you're you
i'm interested in you

[notbunaga]

you know i might not remember much from that day one week ago
but i remember how desperate you sounded back then
and you still do even now

try to chill a little, man
this is getting embarrassing

[appraiser]

[ what is chill ]

i thought it would be fun
it doesn't have to be dinner
it could be ice cream
or
whatever your favorite food is
...
please?

1/2

[notbunaga]

you know what
im gonna try this one more time
and if you still dont get the message i give up

[notbunaga]

[appraiser]

:(

[notbunaga]

[yup...sorry ryoji. she's out]