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[recollecters]

Welcome to Retrospec™, the last social media network you will ever need. You are one of the few selected to test this exciting new platform based on our cutting-edge algorithms. Less than two hundred invitations have gone out, and membership is not currently open to the public. However, we hope you will come to see how useful Retrospec™ is, given time. We have for your use a variety of features such as text, voice, video, and image posts. We encourage you to explore our many options. Please feel free to use this post as a network mingle. Every toplevel can be considered a new post, and threadjacking is permitted. No NPC response will be given. As a reminder, everything besides uploading a profile picture and information was locked until this post. Usernames are the character's full real AU names, not aliases or chosen nicknames or usernames, and seemed to have filled themselves in; nothing characters do can change or obscure their names currently. Oddly, profile pictures still cannot be swapped out at this time, so hopefully you took a good one.

Comments

[parodeity]

i mean
not entirely a joke
you see enough movies with those wedding toasts or like
irl wedding toasts
and dont you just kind of think about what you would say sometimes
i mean
granted
i would probably go off script
but yeah ive put some thought into it
and maybe have some mental notes
maybe some not so mental ones
i also know what i would say at roses wedding
where i also expect to be in the wedding party
we shared a womb rose you have to share space in your wedding party for me

[rhapsodeity]

hmmm
to be honest, ive never thought about either of us getting married before
i was joking because snoop dogg is definitely the most handsomest boy in the whole universe but marrying a lizard is just plain silly!
also i am seventeen and i cannot get married without parental permission and i dont think my parents would let me marry your pet :p
i was at my mom and dads wedding, which was very nice
when you get married i also want to give a speech i think
but this is the first time im thinking about it so ill have to start thinking about it more often
i wouldnt want to mess it up!!!!!
it is so like you to think ahead like that

[parodeity]

ok i knew you were joking about snoop dogg
but you seemed a little sad there wasnt a real speech so i was just letting you know
there kind of is
also obviously neither of us can get married now but were going to be adults someday and clearly i dont want to be ill prepared
when you legitimately choose me as best man (step off rose)
also dont ruin my cred im clearly the type of guy who never thinks about these things in advance or at all ever
and obviously the only reason im thinking about it is because
itd be cool to give a toast at a wedding
movies told me so
peace out

seriously though i have no idea how our conversation got here and i feel like we need to like
stand at the road of the conversational ocean with our thumbs out and hitch a ride back to more coherent shores

[rhapsodeity]

i wasnt really sad!
i was just kind of curious
mostly i was just kind of surprised and i felt like i wasnt being as good of a friend to you as you are to me
which i think is a little silly now because this is over me marrying an iguana!!
but about giving a speech at a wedding
it was cool at mom and dads wedding so i think you are right :o
we were on the roof and it was a nice day and people said nice things about them
i didnt really get it at the time but it felt very important
maybe not to me but to them
so in the end it is pretty cool of you to be so concerned with something like that :)

it got here because youre dave strider!!!!
we talked about my dad hunting chickens this morning somehow lol

[parodeity]

why the fuck would you ever feel like that
youre literally one of the best friends anyone could ever ask for
second to none equal to like
rose
but moving on from the serious bent weve taken here
that we are like
exploring in public
where everyone can see it
as i have just realized

your dad literally could hunt anything and you cant convince me otherwise
its like his superpower
also youre at least 50% responsible for our tangents
youre an active willing participant

[rhapsodeity]

lol
i dont think its weird to talk about this in public, we have had weirder conversations people could hear before!
besides, no one is reading these

[ jade says, immediately realizing that she is reading other people's threads. she winces. she is a liar. ]

my dads just my dad, dave
also no way, you start them!

[parodeity]

[ HE'S READING PEOPLE'S THREADS???? HE'S PRETTY SURE THAT'S A THING PEOPLE ARE DOING??? ]

ok but you know you dont have to admit weve had weirder conversations right
all these people dont know that
i mean
apparently some of them do such as my entire family and yours
but other people havent caught on yet
we gotta try to keep that running

your dads like the manliest person ever
also you start some of them
you started our convo this morning
boom slam touchdown

[rhapsodeity]

im pretty sure at this point that our families have told everyone that we are weirder than weird!
besides, i cant really keep something thats not true running

that is completely different
i sent you a good morning text
there is absolutely nothing strange about me sending you a good morning text

[parodeity]

hey
i believe in us
we could go the distance
we can fool at least one person into thinking were completely capable of holding perfectly normal conversations
we just have to find someone weve never spoken to
and then like
ok this is where the plan gets a little shaky
as in i didnt have a plan when i started this text and i expected to have one by the time i finished it
but that did not happen
so here we are
your time to shine jade whats the plan

you asked me if wed coordered any girlscout cookies yet
thats a pretty random topic
see
im not alone
you do it too
ill cop to doing it more often but youre no innocent jade
youre as guilty as i am
the sin is stuck all over you
sin in this case being random as fuck conversational turns

[rhapsodeity]

there is not way im going into this with a plan!
i have nothing to be embarrassed of
my best friend just turned out to be a great best friend who thinks about our future together
i am very happy to be his best friend as well :)
good dave, bestest best friend <3
also, i think it is a little silly to pretend to be anything but myself and i was just being myself!

you are saying this like girl scout cookies are not the best thing in the world
when they definitely are!
also i saw an ad for them on my phone while checking a webcomic so it wasnt random to me
ew! dont say it like that, its gross eww

[parodeity]

[ sTOP SAYING CUTE EMOTIONAL THINGS IN PUBLIC he can't handle this sincerity. dave response by ONLY REPLYING TO THE LAST PART like a genius ]

ok they are definitely the best thing in the world
we should order like 20 more boxes
and then eat our weight in them when they come in
and possibly die actually that sounds like a bad plan

[rhapsodeity]

that is a terrible plan
we are going to live a long time and youre gonna be a sourpuss old man with a skateboard
and i am gonna be a cute old lady with a cane for smacking you with when you are mean to the whippersnappers
not to mention i think that would be bad for your figure, danceydancepants!
dont you have to maintain a fit form to pull off all those killer moves???? hehehe
we should eat them slowly and savor them
i am pretty sure they dont go bad instantly!

[parodeity]

hey why am i going to be mean to whippersnappers
and a sourpuss
when did we decide this
also i feel like the elderly should maybe not skateboard
it seems dangerous??
and yeah that would be super bad for me i only eat like 1-2 a serving

[rhapsodeity]

we didnt
i did!
it just sounds like fun :D
i bet if there is any old man who can skateboard, it would be you
you would still be getting insane air in your 100s
the kind of LIFFDOFF that would just be CRAZY...
ok actually i do not remember that one entirely :(

[parodeity]

im telling you. . . . air like
that is UNREAL, it
doens't even HAPPEN.
most of the time

[rhapsodeity]

it is going to hapen!!!!
where going to do it man
where going to make it hapen :D

[parodeity]

haha you nailed that one
we should absolutely make something hapen tho
oh i got an invite to your next boardgame night btw

[rhapsodeity]

i do not even remember what we were talking about, so im not sure what i nailed and what is going to hapen lol!
:O
i did not know you had spoken to my mom tonight

[parodeity]

yeah i was telling her id help her fix her notifications
also i forget when we were talking about too so it couldnt have been that important
or if it was well remember later
were not gonna scroll up that would just be too logical

[rhapsodeity]

hehehehe
actually the notification thing is pretty dumb
this app is not very user friendly at all :\

EVERYONE PRETEND I USED NOT RED DAMN

[parodeity]

do you need me to change your notif settings too?

its like when dave became spontaneously became aradia all over again

[rhapsodeity]

nope
im just saying that its incredibly dumb to make an app to gives you a notification every time someone posts
especially when theres apparently over a hundred people using it

stop dragging me

[parodeity]

lmao yeah
its a dumb default setting
but at least its easy to change if you like
know how

face ur shame

[rhapsodeity]

the fact it has to be changed at all just points to these coders or whatever being big, huge, dumb idiots
no feedback button but this is apparently like a testing stage?
that is so pointless!
what is being tested????

wow im being bullied

[parodeity]

our patience with social media app social experiments?
i mean
thats my new hypothesis