retrospec | (no subject)

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resident evil: albert wesker

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who else feels like their "past self" should have remained dead? i can't be the only one.

unrelated: has anyone had the misfortune of being granted injuries or scars from their past lives?

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no. i received a memory of an injury i'm not looking forward to.

i like having my face in one piece.

ok yeah then i guess im a bad news bear but like
scars do happen
you get no warning until you wake up with them
so having a game plan can help

what kind of game plan can one have for that, exactly.

if youre forewarned you can try to figure out how youll cover whatever youll get
even if its a face thing
or at least
you can prep yourself for it emotionally?

that sounds like a pain.

[Not that he won't do it, but he's in complain mode. He doesn't exactly like his face, but he doesn't want it to get wrecked.]

i suppose preparing is better, but i don't even know what it might look like. or if he even lived very long past getting it to get a scar, rather than an open wound.

so
did someone cut your face up or

just once, but it was across the entire thing, with a plasma sword.

to be fair, he deserved it.

wtf did he do

ordered the murder of an entire village. which was performed by soldiers trained from birth to fight. it felt like standard procedure, so to speak.

[A good impression that does not make.]

plus the girl he was fighting seemed like only a teenager while he was a fully grown adult.

oh
ok so thats sure a thing
guess youre not remembering a nice dude then
?

not even remotely.

it's not the biggest surprise, but it's still not something i'm enjoying.

yeah i can see why
a huge disconnect is
unwelcome i would say?
does that feel like not you
when you remember

it does feel like me, as much as i hate it after remembering. like i can understand exactly how that person felt, and yet i can't imagine feeling that way now or how i could reach that sort of mindset. there's still too much i don't know.

do you have a plan for in case you do understand it
?

not really. i was hoping more that i would reject it regardless of whether i understood it.

i suppose this post could sort of serve as a warning, but it doesn't have my face or the name i use associated with it. maybe i should change that.

you can if you want
having watchers isnt always a bad thing i guess
?

i might as well. the only reason i haven't at this point is due to not having a picture of myself available for it.

[As stupid as it might feel to take a picture purely for this... well, he'll figure it out by the time the new month rolls around.]

given how much this "company" is capable of apparently changing our minds, i'd find it more of a comfort to have others keeping me in check. and usually i hate relying on anyone else.

[He won't outright admit it, but he honestly wonders if they can trust themselves. He certainly doesn't have that much faith in his own future mindset at this point.]

time to get pictures taken for your christmas card i guess
and
i know the feel
its kind of weird to rely on people at this point

i'm glad i don't have to do those anymore.

[It's good to be occasionally reminded of the pros to cutting oneself off from one's family. Since it's kind of irreversible at this point.]

weird is understandable, but even near the beginning i could tell it was necessary. even without how dangerous we might become ourselves, none of this is something anyone can deal with alone.

[The camaraderie is sort of a little bit nice... maybe. Sometimes. Ren has wanted to be a part of something larger than himself, even if this wasn't exactly what he had in mind.]

yeah
its nice to know theres people who like
at least sort of sometimes get what youre going through
rather than just doing this completely solo
god can you imagine

[...]

if i were a lesser man i would say that i do indeed have experience in doing these things in a solo way.

[That was terrible.]

Edited 2017-10-03 20:22 (UTC)

i would ask if im missing something
but i just saw your name

if i'm forced to have that name on display i'm going to take advantage of it.

honestly fair id do like the same thing
strider gives me some puns but not as many
more like
cool statements

"cool statements."

should i ask?