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[recollecters]

Greetings, Users. Our system may be experiencing some residual glitches from a recent network malfunction. Our technical team is working on getting these issues under control. Please direct any concerns in the meantime to the HR department at humanresources@retrospec.com. Our staff has furthermore noticed a significant increase in tags and trends for #aprilfools and #pranks. Keep on your toes and be certain to tag your best tricks for Retrospec™! Please feel free to use this post as a network mingle. Every toplevel can be considered a new post, and threadjacking is permitted. No NPC response will be given. Any emails sent to the HR department will be returned with a failure to send notification, and will furthermore automatically be posted to the Retrospec network. Oops? Characters who have been in game for one month will find they can now change their profile pictures. Glitches will be in effect until the 15th and may include: -Usernames changing to a cat, dog, or bird pun. -The Retrospec application being changed into a neon color + animal theme of some variety. -Notifications going off at random and being unable to be turned off. -Various "special effects" crossing the screens when people comment. -Users having to beat a level of pac-man to access the application, and then being made to beat a new level every hour to keep using the application. -Thomas the Tank Engine memes being sent to users every hour for some reason. -Profile pictures being replaced by pictures of rabbits and easter eggs. -New creepy pasta stories appearing upon log-in, to be forwarded to someone before the app can continue to be used -Parental lock and auto-correct on cursing (i.e. fuck -> duck) -A parade of pixel Chocobos or dancing fruit scrolling across the screen after each comment posted

Comments

[true_noir]

BlakKat The video game I could tolerate, as it can be learned.
BlakKat The rest is silly, and really I can put up with your collective silliness at this point.
BlakKat However, I wish to know something very important.
BlakKat Which of you three put a knife in amongst my unmentionables?

[caelestialis]

Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora A knife?! I'm pretty sure this is breaking laws at some point.
Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora You're not hurt, are you?

[true_noir]

BlakKat No, not in the slightest.
BlakKat I was fortunate to feel the metal of the hilt first.
BlakKat But I think the legality of this nonsense has long been agreed upon.
BlakKat The police simply cannot stop it as of yet.

[caelestialis]

Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora That puts a shiver down my spine.
Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora Someone coming into your house and putting a knife there of all places.
Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora I feel like that's all but a threat now. This took a turn for the macabre.

[true_noir]

BlakKat Except that it feels much like the Cloak I wear does.
BlakKat As if it is mine.
BlakKat The invasion of my privacy, though, is the biggest issue at play.

[caelestialis]

Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora It's yours?
Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora No wonder you asked Retrospec if they had anything to do with this.
Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora Is there any signs of them breaking in? Scratches on the locks or things misplaced in your home?

[ she's getting shivers just asking these questions. uurgh. ]

[true_noir]

BlakKat It is not mine, but it feels like it is mine.
BlakKat I still mostly refuse to believe that these are actually my memories I am having.
BlakKat Whatever they say in their promotionals.
BlakKat And there is no sign of such a break-in, no. None at all.
BlakKat Other than a missing coat.

[caelestialis]

Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora Urgh! That sounds awful.
Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora Is there anyway I can help you?
Ainmalsy Furay Meowodora Any way at all?

[true_noir]

BlakKat Well, the cloak is fine and does its task without trouble
BlakKat And it is just a knife in the end, so I don't know that it requires help per se.
BlakKat It is comforting of you to offer, though.

[appraiser]

Crowji Mochickuki which three do you mean?

[true_noir]

BlakKat The three names for the fools that run this app.
BlakKat They are the only three who could be responsible for this, after all.

[appraiser]

Crowji Mochickuki i would have suspected roommates or the mailman before app designers...
Crowji Mochickuki or maybe yourself?
Crowji Mochickuki i once brought a spoon to my room, left it on my desk, and forgot about it until the next day

[true_noir]

BlakKat I live alone, so there are no roommates to speak of.
BlakKat And I live with a deadbolt, so nobody could break in easily.
BlakKat But this is not the sort of knife that you forget owning.
BlakKat If it were cutlery that would be one thing, but this is the stabbing sort of knife.
BlakKat I own a can of pepper spray, not lethal weapons.

[appraiser]

Crowji Mochickuki a stabbing knife...
Crowji Mochickuki my initial reaction would be to suggest bringing it to the police to analyze for fingerprints
Crowji Mochickuki but gloves are so commonplace now, that nobody makes that mistake anymore
Crowji Mochickuki you're not hurt, are you? it hasn't been used?

[true_noir]

BlakKat Admittedly, a bit more of a throwing knife actually, but the same purpose.
BlakKat And I could attempt that, but gloves are simple and the fact is that it has no blood on it.
BlakKat Owning a knife is not illegal, after all, and I am fine.

[appraiser]

Crowji Mochickuki how do you tell the difference between a knife meant for cooking vs one for stabbing vs one for throwing?
Crowji Mochickuki also... it's been mentioned to me before that people are receiving weapons
Crowji Mochickuki i hope nothing bad comes out of that
Crowji Mochickuki and that people are properly disposing of them

[true_noir]

BlakKat I will send you an image.
BlakKat Believe me that it is rather obvious.

[It was long, straight, like a switchblade but not collapsible. The edge was double-bladed and there was a tiny hole, about the size of the middle finger, there ready for it to be twirled on.]

BlakKat It is not unlike a throwing knife at the circuse, but more practical.

[darkinferno]

Nyante Cattailen you too huh
Nyante Cattailen i got back thursday and somehow someone had gotten in my house to leave something there
Nyante Cattailen not in my underwear drawer though so at least there's that

[true_noir]

BlakKat Yes, well, I am not certain that this is them being perverted.
BlakKat It felt like it was hidden away, like a hold-out weapon or a secret thing.
BlakKat Almost like finding it under the pillow.
BlakKat What did they leave you?

[darkinferno]

Nyante Cattailen how secret agent
Nyante Cattailen mine was propped up against the couch when i walked in the front door
Nyante Cattailen like someone had wanted to make sure i noticed it right away
Nyante Cattailen it's a wooden sword

[true_noir]

BlakKat A wooden sword, such as for practice and the like?
BlakKat That seems a strange thing to get, though not as strange as some certainly.
BlakKat Do you remember anything about it?

[darkinferno]

Nyante Cattailen yeah exactly like that
Nyante Cattailen i had one before

[And now, here's the question of how much he wants to divulge... he isn't sure he wants to tell the entire network that he's remembered how to fight. Something like that seems like it might be a better idea to keep hidden until the right moment, given who he is and the sorts of things people expect of him.]

Nyante Cattailen probably played with them or something, i don't remember specifics
Nyante Cattailen just that it's right

[Which is true! In the memory he has of him fighting, he definitely wasn't wielding a wooden sword, even if he doesn't remember what sort of sword he was using.]

[true_noir]

BlakKat That feels, somehow very familiar.
BlakKat Perhaps you'll have a vision of being in a kendo club very soon.
BlakKat Or maybe you were one of those ren faire types.

[She was trying to be optimistic here.]

[darkinferno]

Nyante Cattailen duck i hope not
Nyante Cattailen if i was one of those losers i think i'd have to go into hiding in shame
Nyante Cattailen not kendo either, sorey and i tried that one already
Nyante Cattailen i'm not too worried about it
Nyante Cattailen so what sort of a knife did you get anyways

[true_noir]

Chloe Bouchard I see.
Chloe Bouchard I am not 100% sure, but I think it is a throwing knife.
Chloe Bouchard The weight feels like it is meant to be thrown, not carried, if that makes sense.