retrospec | (no subject)

Happy New Years, users.

I'll cut to the chase; the barrier we instilled a few months ago is decaying quickly and we're sorting through the new data as fast as we can. This barrier was originally designed to contain a rogue error. There are several of you who have taken care of this issue and from here we will handle the rest...thank you. The influx of data will help us decode our next steps.

As mentioned, we've spent December tracing several magical sources that are coming up in our readings. We're doing the best we can to trace Clarence--Mr. Vanderweele, and corral the effects he's altering in the city. I believe we're ready to tear down the firewall and begin exploring further. If our information is correct, we're really breaking the boundaries of the layers we've discovered lately! It's exciting, don't you think?

The only information I can offer is that we will need you to be strong no matter what happens. We believe things have changed outside of security measures we've set in place, though we will need more data to understand the best way to stabilize the city from his control. We understand if you cannot and do not wish to help, but please know we're doing everything we can.

Please take care.

Joanne Wiseman
Technician 2nd class
Retr

spec Incorporated

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is receiving an answer late better or worse than no answer at all? which hypothetical version of her should suck an egg more

Definitely better. I'm fine doing freelance investigation but eventually I'm gonna wanna know if my "boss" is even doing anything with the shit I'm figuring out for them.

So now we're gonna start hacking, I guess.

thats fair. even if shit rolls downhill its good to know theyre aware its rolling

i guess. i hope its like metaphorical hacking with swords and stuff. i like to think im tech savvy but not. THAT tech savvy.

Now you're speaking my language. Just because I'm turning into a robot doesn't mean I know how all this shit works, but I've got two swords from the app and I already spent the better part of a year figuring those out real good.

[she mouths the word "yes" in real life]

a lot of computer problems would be easier solved if they were compatible with swords

Haven't met one that isn't yet if you try hard and believe in yourself.

Man, I used to do tier 2 phone tech support and I literally already forgot it all. Swords are way easier to troubleshoot.

idk about myself but i super believe in swords. never led me astray

its complicated and long! and unfortunately power most of our shit

real talk tho i dont super know if you like. sharpen swords or buff them or clean them or whatever after using them so troubleshooting swords could be an actual problem

Oh yeah, I should probably find a blacksmith or something. Don't think I can pop down to Aldi and get a whetstone for these things.

One of my best friends is a sword. I could ask him for any tips, maybe for both of us.

sword care is essential for frequent stabbing

...hows the sword life treat him? feeling healthy and sharp i hope

Stabbing is so passe. Real sword girls slash, and also hack.

Seems to be treating him pretty well. I know you're looking for puns but I don't think I've asked him how it feels to be a sword. Not in that many words, at least.

damn i need to get back into fashion ive just being doing standard intimidation for a while

puns are easier to process. is he like. a sword with a mouth hanging off the side and does he need sword food. does he turn into a sword with magic and hes human mostly

Hey, intimidation is one of the fundamentals. The best way to use a sword is to never have to swing it.

The second one. Probably. I've never actually seen him turn into a sword, but he told me I can use him like a sword if I have to, so. Who knows.

that feels like a really cool quote from like art of war or something

...are u sure it wasnt a pickup line

Yeah, that's me, I was Sun Tzu in a past life, you got me pinned. He reincarnated into a stoner dropout with two swords.

Like 95% sure it wasn't, considering him and me are both turbo gay.

being real that sounds way better than being sun tzu any day. he wishes he could be so lucky

oh sweet, fucking go hard on cutting up shit together then

Yeah, well, I wish I could be that lucky too, lately. Turns out robot parts and THC don't mix. Who knew.

aw dude! that sucks! damn no one ever talks about how robots need to get high

Robots DO need to get high. Thank god someone around here is talking some sense. Wonder if the world I'm supposedly from had any robot drugs.

i feel like adult cartoons have taught me its like. oil or some shit. dammit dont we have at least one scientist who could work on real issues like this.

Robots CANNOT get high on oil. That can't be it. Otherwise I'd be high all the time once that shit kicks in.

I'm gonna make an open post in the middle of the night. Calling all nerds, who wants to make me robot drugs.

nerds, please, we're begging u, for the greater good, make robo drugs